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Thin Man Found Living Inside Fargo Family’s Chair
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Thin Man Found Living Inside Fargo Family’s Chair

February 10th, 2016 | by Johnnny
Fargo, ND – In what police are calling a “very bizarre situation”, a thin elderly man was recently discovered to be living inside a Fargo family’s large comfy chair, which had been in the middle of their...
Moorhead Imposes Harsh New Penalties For All Non-Recyclers
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Moorhead Imposes Harsh New Penalties For All Non-Recyclers

February 6th, 2016 | by Johnnny
Moorhead, MN – Effective immediately, the City of Moorhead will now be enforcing stringent new penalties for any and all households that do not recycle. Moorhead’s Recycling Czar Marv Hammerstone: “Some folks...
Horoscopes For The Week Of February 4, 2016
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Horoscopes For The Week Of February 4, 2016

February 3rd, 2016 | by Nina Verbena
Aries (March 21 – April 19) The Ram Take time to really enjoy the first half of your Superbowl party this weekend. It will become a cherished memory of how good your life was before “The Buffalo Wing...
FM Observer Secures Naming Rights For Blue Post-it Notes
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FM Observer Secures Naming Rights For Blue Post-it Notes

February 3rd, 2016 | by Nick
Temecula, CA—A much-anticipated blockbuster deal has been finalized. After extensive negotiations, the FM Observer has inked a lucrative branding contract with popular sticky note manufacturer Post-It. For the next decade,...
Frack Lives Matter Movement Galvanizes In Western North Dakota
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Frack Lives Matter Movement Galvanizes In Western North Dakota

February 2nd, 2016 | by Nina Verbena
Williston, ND – With oil prices tumbling and jobs disappearing, western North Dakotans are channeling their frustration into a powerful, singular message: Frack Lives Matter. Spokesperson Ole Baryll says the once booming...
New ND License Plates Being Recalled Because Fonts Suck
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New ND License Plates Being Recalled Because Fonts Suck

February 1st, 2016 | by Johnnny
Bismarck, ND – For Immediate Release: Announcement: All of the new North Dakota ‘Sunrise’ license plates are being immediately recalled because: The fonts suck! FMO: Hello? Could you please be a little more...
The Entire Internet Will Be Down For Maintenance This Weekend
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The Entire Internet Will Be Down For Maintenance This Weekend

January 29th, 2016 | by Johnnny
Silicon Valley, CA – The Internet Maintenance Task Force has announced that the entire Internet will be down this weekend to perform some server maintenance and important system upgrades. Luckily, this should only affect...
Fargo Man Performs Amateur Exorcism
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Fargo Man Performs Amateur Exorcism

January 28th, 2016 | by Nick
Fargo, ND – An area man, without the help of a brave Catholic priest, has completely freed his significant other from demonic possession. Blenn Fristle, 42, was able to purge the darkest beast from within his wife Pavia by...
First Fargo Robin Sighting A Sign Of Spring And Global Warming
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First Fargo Robin Sighting A Sign Of Spring And Global Warming

January 27th, 2016 | by Johnnny
Fargo, ND – Multiple reports of a robin sighting in the trees around the West Acres Mall indicate that Spring is just around the corner. Sheila McCox who had just entered the mall’s parking lot said: “I was so...
Big Demand For Small Hats Due To Zika Virus
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Big Demand For Small Hats Due To Zika Virus

January 26th, 2016 | by Johnnny
Hatboro, Pennsylvania – As the mutating Zika Virus spreads by mosquitos through America, the fashion industry is wasting no time trying to get ahead of a new trend. Since the Zika Virus causes microcephaly, hat sizes will...