Johnnny’s Fifth Retrospective (Posts 400-500)

February 14th, 2017 | by Johnnny
My second one hundred posts.

My 5th 100 posts. Now I can begin to build an even longer fence!

Since 500 is such a nice round number, it was decided to use the occasion of my 500th post to take a trip back down memory lane.

So, it’s time once again to look back on Johnnny’s last 100 posts on your FM Observer.

All posts are listed as clickable hyperlinks in chronological order. Enjoy!

400. Johnnny’s Fourth 100 Posts
401. Obama First Family To Book A Room At Trump’s Turnberry Golf Resort
402. Fargo Woman Suing Led Zeppelin For Plagiarizing Her Song Kashmir
403. New Pizza Business To Specialize In Deliveries To Jails And Prisons
404. Psychic Predicts Large Number Of Fargo Sinkholes To Appear In The Coming Months
405. Photos By Fritz The Cat Opens In Moorhead
406. Black Lights Matter Has One Small Problem
407. Pokemon Parents Pleading Please Stop The Insanity
408. FMO’s First Annual Snackathon Eating Contest
409. Middle Finger Replaces Frown Face On Social Media
410. New Fargo Motorcycle Gang Called The Hell Monkeys
411. Bison Turf To Rise Again From The Ashes Bigger & Better Than Ever
412. Army Corps Of Engineers To Straighten Out Red River For Improved Flowability
413. Young Fargo Inventor Hits It Big On Shark Tank
414. West Acres Mall Stolen By Man Dressed As Security Guard
415. Zika Fears Creating Need For Last Minute Olympic Substitutes
416. Fisherman Catches Rainbow Trout On Internet Using Clickbait
417. Ask For Your Free Beer During Free Beer Week
418. Milkshakes Are A Great Way To Add Some Poundage
419. FMObserver Lights Candle For World Peace
420. Ryan Lochte Falsely Reports That Zika Caused His Hair Color Change
421. Fargo School Board Reveals Its List Of Lofty Goals For The Upcoming Year
422. Blake Shelton & Gwen Stefani To Stay In Guestroom Of Randomly Selected Fargo Home
423. Rolling Stones Latest New Hit Sympathy For Dementia
424. Florida Hurricane Giving Zika Mosquitos A Free Ride To The Entire East Coast
425. FMO Buys Gilligan’s Island For Our Readers
426. Most People In FM Area Consider Themselves To Be Above Average
427. FMO Helps Gary Johnson Answer The Question: What Is A Leppo?
428. Send A Basket Of Deplorables From Hillary’s Flower Shoppe
429. George Soros Admits To Being Emperor Palpatine
430. Police Turkeys Helping Moorhead Police Solve Crimes
431. Stephen King To Read Scary Books To Children At Fargo Library
432. Battle Of Wounded Knee Could Leave Adrian Peterson A Paralegal For The Rest Of His Life
433. Fargo Hires A Fourth Grader To Help Prevent System Hacking
434. If You See This Chipmunk, Contact Your Local Authorities Immediately
435. FMO To Host Incredible Meet & Greet Session With Carson Wentz
436. Boy Gets Suspended From School For Saying Shih-Tzu
437. New Meta-University Soon To Open In FM Area
438. Amnesia Support Group Forgets When & Where To Meet
439. Young Man Digging Fargo Diversion By Himself
440. During Another Moment Of Confusion, Hillary Says She’s Voting For Trump
441. Many Companies See Benefits To Adding Whack-A-Mole To Their Employee Break Rooms
442. Global Warmers Now Say Global Cooling Is Evidence Of Long Term Warming Trend
443. UFO Spotted Within Fargo City Limits
444. World Famous Scandinavian Folk Singer Coming To Fargo
445. Researchers Confirm That Thursday Is The New Friday
446. Gawk Tour Bus To Visit Pipeline Protest Site Without Getting Involved
447. Jason Bourne Moving Back To North Dakota After Learning His Identity
448. Husband Living In Doghouse Learns To Do Tricks For Treats
449. West Fargo Garage Band Hits Big Time After Being Discovered By Leonardo Dicaprio
450. Fargo Man Returns To Life After Clocks Changed Back One Hour
451. Vote For Vivian Nutwrangler Because She Wants What You Want
452. President Trump Puts Pink Floyd In Charge Of Building The Wall
453. Lutheran Social Service Bringing In Many Mice From MN Lakes Area Due To Lack Of Acorns There
454. Super Moon Proves It’s Moving Closer To Earth
455. Facebook To Begin Charging Users A $30 Monthly Usage Fee
456. Harambe’s Family To Sue Zoo Who Blew Him To Timbuktu
457. Fargo Psychic Wins Lottery For Ninth Time
458. Elderly Fargo Man Arrested For Driving 29MPH On I-29
459. Hatchimal Hoarders Selling This Year’s Hot Items Out Of Their Basement
460. Twelve New Words Being Added To FMO’s Dictionary
461. Some FM Area Businesses Allowing Use Of Cookies As Fungible Barter Tool
462. Eggnog Support Groups Now Forming For The Holiday Season
463. Bigfoot Spotted Wandering Around Just Outside Of Moorhead
464. Some Useful Phrases When Travelling To Norway
465. An Online Christmas Card You Can Send To A Friend
466. Man Found Living Inside Fargo Piano
467. After Devastating Loss, NDSU Bison Football Program To Be Cancelled
468. FMO’s Award Winning List Of Things To Do During The Holiday Season
469. Global Cooling Forces Fargo To Purchase Ice Breaker For Red River
470. Vikings’ Plane Misses Green Bay Runway Wide Left
471. Federal Affordable Cheese Act Providing Free Cheese From US Government
472. Fargo’s Ice Maze Is Free Freezing Fun
473. Recently Discovered Neanderthal Man Suing For Being Called Neanderthal
474. First 2017 Fargo Newborn Gets A Carson Wentz Tattoo
475. Prince Look-A-Like Also Loves Purple
476. Fargo To Get Its Very Own Soap Opera
477. Fargo Man Becomes Very Attached To His Brick
478. Public Service Announcements #1
479. Recounts Show That Jill Stein Won The Election
480. Ways To Stay Warm During A North Dakota Winter
481. Fargo Facebook Families Fatally Fear Fifty Foot Fast Flood Forecast
482. Fargo Teen Accidentally Creates An Actual Wormhole In His Bedroom
483. Volunteers Needed To Test New Bullet Proof Jackets
484. President Trump To Make Salvation Army Part Of US Military
485. Public Service Announcements #2
486. New Fargo Religious Radio Station To Broadcast Only In Tongues
487. Local Youth Has Read Every Book In The Fargo Public Library
488. Large School Bus Full Of Illegal Aliens To Pass Between Earth And Moon
489. UND Offering Classes On How To Wake Up & Get Out Of Bed
490. After Trump Converts To Mormonism He Plans To Add Another First Lady
491. One Of The Most Anticipated Ads During The Super Bowl Is For ‘The Super Bowl’
492. New Downtown Fargo Bar/Restaurant To Provide Horse Stables For Its Cowboy Patrons
493. Fargo North Dakota Seeking To Copyright The Word ‘Fargo’
494. Public Service Announcements #3
495. FMO Planning An Exciting Bus Tour Excursion For Our Readers To The Fossil Fish Festival
496. Glyndon MN Considering Covering Entire Town With A Clear Dome
497. Pinochle Players Spending Most Of The Time Arguing About Trump
498. Ambien User Somnambulates To Ex-Wife’s House To Ask For Nullification Of Divorce
499. Rural Fargo Man Cornered By Moose For A Really Really Long Time

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Contributing writer since January, 2013. I've been described by myself as a piano-playing omnivore who hates typos but loves chocolate milk in his coffee. As a Life Coach, some lessons I like to pass onto others are: 1. don't stare at strangers, especially in jail, 2. don't leave fun to find fun, 3. never pet a burning dog, 4. don't eat more than you can lift, and 5. when in doubt, jot it down. Click on any picture in my posts to see them in their full glory. All have been tweaked with either or or :o)