Tag Archives: birthday

Sign Up To Join The FMO Birthday Club For Only $100

For a mere $100, you will enjoy all the perks of being a proud member of the FMO Birthday Club.

West Fargo, ND – Are you a person who has a birthday and who likes to have fun? Have you been looking for a way to make perfunctory birthdays more functory?

May we suggest that you join the FM Observer Birthday Club by sending us all of your personal identifying information, along with $100 for shipping and handling.

From there, the possibilities are endless!

On or near your birthday, you may receive a personal call or visit from The Pope who might even give you a free rosary, and show you different cool things you can do with it!

We may do a satirically fake-news post about you on our website and unleash it to go viral in South Dakota!

You possibly could get any number of hot pizzas delivered to your current GPS location and/or multiple singing telegrams by entire robed church choirs!

Your name might be entered into a drawing to travel with us to Goosey Goosey Island for an endless bonfire weekend where you may be taught our secret double handshake and possibly be given your very own emergency whistle.

By joining the FMO Birthday Club for only $100, you could maybe win a lifetime supply of some random items selected especially for you.

Finally, for any new and fully-paid members to the FMO Birthday Club, you will not only be invited to go to the Humane Society and select yourself a free puppy, but you will also get to name it and keep it for the rest of your lives!

Happy Birthday

FM Observer Staff Writer Turns 89

Happy BirthdayFargo, ND – Big day today at the FM Observer.  Long-time staff writer Hugh Janus turns 89 years old today!  This is such a monumental achievement for Hugh Janus that that we went all-out for his birthday.

To start it off, the entire staff was required to drive to work at walking speed.  Office attire consisted of wearing mandatory nipple-high pants and not showering for a week.  The break room was filled with different hard candy.  All butterscotch flavored.  Our TV had The Little House on The Prairie playing on repeat.  To top it off we had 10 mandatory bathroom breaks and “back to the oldies” playing 24/7.

Overall it was a wonderful day.  Hugh Janus ended up falling asleep in the bathroom until 3pm but it was still fun.  Please send your birthday wishes to Hugh Janus!