Tag Archives: famous

Famous Rock Band ‘Autopsia’ Is Coming To Fargo; Tickets Selling Madly

Autopsia will turn your life upside down!

Fargone, ND Another excessively huge concert is just about to be announced for Fargo, North Dakotah!

Autopsia will be performing some of their greatest mega-hits, including:

Coffee and Cremation, Dead Upon Arrival, Peace Corpse, Skeletonia, The Last Laugh, Coffin Syrup, Prince Deadward, Hotel Gravestonia, Postmortem Fest, Autopsycho, Room 666, and Deadendless.

This incredible concert is brought to you by Hell-Oh Productions.

For ticket information, listen to the radio, watch TV, read newspapers, or just talk with your friends.

Do not miss Autopsia performing all the songs that made them one of the most recognizable bands in the world of music.

FM Observer Rating: ★★★★★

Fargo Artist Paints First-Ever Moving Picture Using Kinetic Oil Paints

The future is here: framed oil paintings that actually move on the canvas!?

Fargo, ND – Local artist Amsterdam Douglass has apparently achieved the unachievable!

This semi-famous Fargo artist, previously mostly known for his altruistic generosities, has now somehow painted an oil painting that shows actual movement on the canvas upon which it was painted and within the frame in which it is physically bordered.

When asked how he did it, Amsterdam Douglass slowly smiled, while only saying: “Kinetic Oil Paints!”

When asked what the hell are kinetic oil paints, Amsterdam Douglass slowly smiled, as he gracefully reached for his legume-flavored vape pen.

When asked about his legume-flavored vaporizer, Amsterdam Douglass slowly blew a large, thick, legume-flavored vape cloud, into which he virtually vanished via vicarious vaporization.

An Exclusive FMO Interview With Walt Whitman

Walt Whitman says hello to all our FMO readers!

A conversation with Walt Whitman (1819-1892)

FMO: How do you feel about having an image of yourself on a postage stamp?
Walt Whitman: If you done it, it ain’t bragging.

FMO: Many consider you one of America’s great poets and some call you the Father Of Free Verse. Your thoughts on this, sir?
WW: To have great poets, there must be great audiences.

FMO: Your bio indicates you were also a journalist, a teacher, a government clerk, and a volunteer nurse during the Civil War. You seem to have a real connection with the common folk.
WW: I dance with the dancers and drink with the drinkers.

FMO: You have obviously written a lot. Do you also like to spend time reading?
WW: A morning-glory at my window satisfies me more than the metaphysics of books.

FMO: Any thoughts on the current state of world affairs?
WW: Judging from the main portions of the history of the world, so far, justice is always in jeopardy.

FMO: What do you think the future holds?
WW: The future is no more uncertain than the present.

FMO: How do you deal with life on a daily basis?
WW: To me, every hour of the day and night is an unspeakably perfect miracle.

FMO: What lessons have you learned?
WW: I have learned that to be with those I like is enough.

FMO: What advice would you care to share with our readers?
WW: Be curious, not judgmental. Keep your face always toward the sunshine and shadows will fall behind you.

Note: Every response is an actual quotation from Walt Whitman.

Fargo’s Most Famous Poet Tries To Explain His Best Works

Sir Nedley Graves looks back over his incredibly poetic career while sitting on his Fargone porch supping tea and scones.

Fargo, ND – Nedley Graves is known far and wide as probably thee most famous poet to ever call Fargo, ND his home.

His whole life has been spent writing poetry to the extent that his home is so full of it that it was specially zoned as a historic library of major literary significance, so say his fans and critics alike, from butte to coast.

Nedley Graves’ poems come almost entirely to him from his dreams, spoken to him through some sort of divine communication system known only to those who reach the pinnacle of success as has been achieved by Sir Nedley Graves.

Unfortunately, most don’t have a fricking clue what his poems are about and leave many readers of his most-finest works scratching their collective heads as to what the hell is being conveyed.

Nonetheless, poems of this caliber only seem to come along once, perhaps twice or thrice, in a lifetime and this is the reason why Nedley Graves is considered to be among Fargo’s finest when it comes to excessively excelling.

Here is just a sweet taste of one of Nedley Graves’ most famous poems which is simply entitled: Be-Dwelkered Dreams

Be-dwelkered dreams coarse happenstance
Upon my charmanst filter of life’s light
Gridden through and through what I mistook
For fraid temprons glowing from my firey bon

Carpathoned spokes unspoken to our laird
Unsquared by merely morsald chambermaids
Unsquizoned paths to pay in fields of maise
Whilst we chase down our feelings underlow

A top poetical critic named Sir Charles J. Bastion recently wrote of Nedley Graves’ life’s works: “It seems like it is really great stuff but nobody I’ve ever encountered has any fracking guesses as to what the flying flock these poems are about! I personally think his whole body of work is one giant crock of shit, but would never admit that on the record. This is off the record, right?”

If you are a huge Nedley Graves fan who would like to nibble scones and sup tea with Fargo’s supposed poetic master while he tries to explain some of his so-called better poems and attempts to translate them into reality, please call or email our Office of Literary Arts for dates, times, and perhaps even some rhymes.

Million Dollar Painting Found In Garage Rafters


Circus Sunday

Fargo, ND – Vern Vandegrift was lighting a cigar out in their cold, un-insulated, detached garage when he noticed something up in the frozen rafters.

It appeared to be an old dusty box.

Vern somehow got the box down from the rafters to take a peak inside.

He carefully slid a well-wrapped framed picture out of the old box and safely onto his garage workbench.

What he found himself looking at was a signed original painting by one of the most elusive French painters of all time: Jan-Panko LaPlonk.

The painting turned out to be the rarely seen “Circus Sunday” which had been lost since the mid-1800’s. Its value is estimated to be $1,000,000.

Now, Vern Vandegrift lights his cigar out in a warm, well-insulated garage. On the wall next to him hangs Jan-Panko LaPlonk’s rarely seen “Circus Sunday”.

Painfully Normal Guy Discovered Living In Los Angeles

THIS GUY is a Los Angeles resident

THIS GUY lives in L.A.

Los Angeles, CA—SoCal. L.A. Paradise City. The coolest city with the coolest people with the best weather. You gotta be a badass, actor, musician, beautiful person or an otherwise famous celebrity to live there…or so we thought.

The age-old stereotype that only cool people live in Los Angeles has been officially debunked. The Observer has learned that Alan Henley, a lame, has been living in SoCal his entire life.

Alan was born an only child to an accountant and a stay-at-home mother back in 1978. Ever since, he’s been an introverted, non-famous Average Joe. “I think i’m pretty normal,” Alan says. He works as a stockbroker at a brokerage firm in Santa Monica where he grew up. He plays World of Warcraft in his spare time. “I mean, i’m no Brad Pitt obviously, but…so what?”

The Observer suspects that Alan might not be the only rube hilariously coexisting within that sexy hotbed of entertainment and glamour.

A Los Angeles Elite could not be reached for comment.