Tag Archives: jetpack

Next Fargo Air Show Promises Some Amazing Never-Seen-Before Acts

One amazing act involves jets flying in opposite directions but sharing the same smoke trail!

Fargo, ND – The upcoming Fargo Air Show has somehow put together fifteen new acts and entertainment for people who think they’ve seen everything.

Yo, you ain’t seen nothing like this year’s line-up of aerial grande entertainment!

Here is a “summerized” listing of fifteen reasons why you should not miss this next Fargo Air Show:

The Flying Nuns
Giant Space Cannon
Phone Drone juggling
Stealth bomber rides
Mega G-Force Stimulator
Mach Four demonstrations
Jet Pack Races for all ages
Snoopy’s Sopwith Camel flyover
Meet & Greet some NASA monkeys
Cloud Seeding by the Rainmakers
Princess Layla’s Star Wars ship
Opposite-direction jet smoke trails
Wright Brothers 1st flight re-enactment
Trained Bald Eagles flying in formations
Vertical hot air balloon rides to stratosphere

Area Man Cancels Plan To Follow Solar Eclipse Across United States Using Solar-Powered Jetpack

Viddio Burstweiler, Scientist. PhD in Aerotronics, doctorate in Aeronautics.

Fargo, ND – Area mad scientist Viddio Burstweiler wanted to be the first man to traverse a solar eclipse’s entire path of totality as the moon followed it. He noticed that the moon’s umbral shadow will take a “leisurely” trek across the entire United States, covering 2,496 miles in just 90.7 minutes, whizzing by at an average speed of 1,651 mph. This was an attainable mark for his homemade jetpack.

One major setback, however, was that his jetpack is solar-powered.

Path Of Totality®

“I had all the knobs tweaked and I’s dotted until I realized the moon would be between me and the source of my device’s power.”

The Observer caught wind of Vid’s masterplan weeks ago but, like Vid, failed to realize the fatal flaw in his logic until he canceled an August 18th follow-up interview due to this unforeseen circumstance. That is why we didn’t say anything to him at the time.

Looks like he blew it bigly. The next total eclipse isn’t until 2024 at which point most every human will (unfortunately for Vid) be equipped with a nuclear fusion jetpack and be fully capable of traversing the Path Of Totality quite easily themselves.