March 9th, 2020 | by
Johnnny Mars, Milky Way – Shortly after suspending his 2020 presidential campaign, Bernie Sanders waved to everyone on Earth as he boarded his plane for Mars. “This is a bittersweet moment. Bitter because Joe Biden looks to...
February 11th, 2020 | by
Johnnny Penacook, New Hampshire – Presidential candidate Amy Klobuchar successfully wrestled a Bernie Sanders supporter to the floor after being suddenly attacked while campaigning near New Hampshire’s capital city of...
November 27th, 2018 | by
Johnnny Fargo, ND – At this time, Fargo native Rinfret Pounders will neither confirm or deny that he is planning on running for president of the United States in the next presidential election. Speculation surrounding the...
January 10th, 2017 | by
Johnnny Steinsville, Pennsylvania – Green Party presidential candidate Jill Stein has finally finished doing her own vote recount in Wisconsin, Michigan and Pennsylvania. Based on her new final count vote totals, she is declaring...
September 9th, 2016 | by
Johnnny Aleppo, Syria – In an effort to help presidential candidate Gary Johnson confidently answer the question: “What is a Leppo?“, the FM Observer has done some quick yet thorough research into this impotent...
January 8th, 2016 | by
Johnnny Long Island, NY – Fed up with all the shinanigans going on in government and politix today, the Long Island Ice Tea Party is ready to make its move. Pre-caucus meetings of the Long Island Ice Tea Party are being held in...
September 10th, 2015 | by
Johnnny New York, NY – While standing on top of his Trump Tower building, Donald Trump promised to a small gaggle of reporters that if elected president, he would shave the top of his own personal Trump Tower. Call it a gimmick if...
August 14th, 2015 | by
Johnnny New York, NY – The next president of the United States wants to thank you in advance for your vote by dropping $100 bills from the sky. If you live in a key battleground state, expect to see Donald Trump’s plane doing...
