Recipes For Success

Bernie Sanders Waves Good-Bye To Humanity As He Leaves To Become The First President Of Mars
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Bernie Sanders Waves Good-Bye To Humanity As He Leaves To Become The First President Of Mars

March 9th, 2020 | by Johnnny
Mars, Milky Way – Shortly after suspending his 2020 presidential campaign, Bernie Sanders waved to everyone on Earth as he boarded his plane for Mars. “This is a bittersweet moment. Bitter because Joe Biden looks to...
Amy Klobuchar Wrestles Woman To Ground After Being Attacked
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Amy Klobuchar Wrestles Woman To Ground After Being Attacked

February 11th, 2020 | by Johnnny
Penacook, New Hampshire – Presidential candidate Amy Klobuchar successfully wrestled a Bernie Sanders supporter to the floor after being suddenly attacked while campaigning near New Hampshire’s capital city of...
Fargo Man Won’t Confirm Nor Deny That He’s Running For President
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Fargo Man Won’t Confirm Nor Deny That He’s Running For President

November 27th, 2018 | by Johnnny
Fargo, ND – At this time, Fargo native Rinfret Pounders will neither confirm or deny that he is planning on running for president of the United States in the next presidential election. Speculation surrounding the...
Recounts Show That Jill Stein Won The Election
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Recounts Show That Jill Stein Won The Election

January 10th, 2017 | by Johnnny
Steinsville, Pennsylvania – Green Party presidential candidate Jill Stein has finally finished doing her own vote recount in Wisconsin, Michigan and Pennsylvania. Based on her new final count vote totals, she is declaring...
FMO Helps Gary Johnson Answer The Question: What Is A Leppo?
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FMO Helps Gary Johnson Answer The Question: What Is A Leppo?

September 9th, 2016 | by Johnnny
Aleppo, Syria – In an effort to help presidential candidate Gary Johnson confidently answer the question: “What is a Leppo?“, the FM Observer has done some quick yet thorough research into this impotent...
Long Island Ice Tea Party Seeking Their Presidential Candidate
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Long Island Ice Tea Party Seeking Their Presidential Candidate

January 8th, 2016 | by Johnnny
Long Island, NY – Fed up with all the shinanigans going on in government and politix today, the Long Island Ice Tea Party is ready to make its move. Pre-caucus meetings of the Long Island Ice Tea Party are being held in...
If Elected President, Trump Vows To Go Bald
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If Elected President, Trump Vows To Go Bald

September 10th, 2015 | by Johnnny
New York, NY – While standing on top of his Trump Tower building, Donald Trump promised to a small gaggle of reporters that if elected president, he would shave the top of his own personal Trump Tower. Call it a gimmick if...
Donald Trump Planning Fly-Overs To Drop $100 Bills In Many Key Voting States
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Donald Trump Planning Fly-Overs To Drop $100 Bills In Many Key Voting States

August 14th, 2015 | by Johnnny
New York, NY – The next president of the United States wants to thank you in advance for your vote by dropping $100 bills from the sky. If you live in a key battleground state, expect to see Donald Trump’s plane doing...