Some retirement homes in Fargo are “not to be messed with” due to suspicious gang activities.
Fargo, ND – Apparently residents of opposing retirement homes in the Fargo area have been flashing gang signs back and forth at each other to the point where it has become “problematical”.
Police reports indicate that residents of Death Valley Retirement Home have been ramping up tensions between themselves and their opposition gang which resides at Purgatory Senior Living.
“We’re not sure how this whole thing got started but we do know it cannot keep on escalating like it has been without a bloody full-blown gang fight breaking out sometime soon,” offers Police officer Lt. Greg Greeno, who’s been assigned to this case.
Retirement home managers are considering searching resident rooms in search of weapons that could be used in a gang fight such as wooden spoons, rolled up newspapers, and even toothbrushes.
For now, you are being asked to stay away from Death Valley Retirement Home as well as Purgatory Senior Living until tensions can be ratcheted down a bit.
If you are going to visit a loved one who happens to be a gang member at one of these retirement homes, please pay attention to any gang signs you observe during your visit and report them immediately to the authorities.
Fargo, ND – Bathroom sports are a daily thing and Jim Briton is the best of it all.
Years and years ago, Jim Briton was too young to play bathroom swords with all the other folks. But after growing up and practicing on his own on a daily basis, he is now the best bathroom swordsman in Fargo-Moorhead.
Being able to practice bathroom swordsmanship on my own all these years has really given me the advantage over the others as my mother would always clean up after me. Large sporting events bathrooms are the best place to show my skills. Many men want to challenge my piss swordfighting skills and I gladly take the challenge. They usually walk out of the bathroom battered and beaten I’m that good.
How did you get interested in bathroom swordfighting? “Well, I got bored just pissing straight into the toilet. I’m standing there holding my piss pump thinking there’s got to be more to it than this. That’s when I started challenging others around me to a swordfighting match.”
Since walking into bathrooms all over the city, Jim Briton’s career has soared. Everybody knows him. Everybody fears him. There is no bathroom swordsman Jim can’t handle.
Just last month Jim Briton beat over 100 men in bathroom swording and the numbers are rising.
I’m on a roll and nobody can stop me. It’s a great feeling. I’m continually improving my bathroom swordfighting skills and I feel confident I can walk into any bathroom and beat anyone I wish.
Jim Briton is sure to reach an all-american bathroom swordfighting status soon. Keep an eye out for Jim in the Fargo-Moorhead area. This local celebrity could be pissing right next to you.