Recipes For Success

Russian Roulette Club (Once Again) Seeking One New Member
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Russian Roulette Club (Once Again) Seeking One New Member

March 30th, 2020 | by Johnnny
Moscow, Idaho – A Russian Roulette Club is actively seeking one new member to fill the vacant seat of a former member who suffered a mishap. “In any game of chance you have your ups and downs, and unfortunately for...
West Fargo Couple Dies In Car While Waiting For Traffic Light To Turn Green
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West Fargo Couple Dies In Car While Waiting For Traffic Light To Turn Green

February 18th, 2020 | by Johnnny
West Fargo, ND – In a stunningly slow turn of events, an older West Fargo couple died while waiting for a red light to turn green. Leth and Helt Ringgold had pulled up to a red traffic light which recently had been having...
Man’s Death Blamed On Panic Attack Caused By Extreme Frustration During Jigsaw Puzzle Tournament
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Man’s Death Blamed On Panic Attack Caused By Extreme Frustration During Jigsaw Puzzle Tournament

January 24th, 2020 | by Johnnny
Fargo, ND – What began as a potentially fun afternoon gradually swirled into a personal implosion for one jigsaw puzzle tournament participant. Mr. Lemm Tweed–Clopton entered the annual jigsaw puzzle tournament with...
Fargo Man Crushed To Death While Trying To Carry 99-Pack Of Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer
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Fargo Man Crushed To Death While Trying To Carry 99-Pack Of Pabst Blue Ribbon Beer

November 21st, 2019 | by Johnnny
Fargo, ND – In an unfortunate incident involving the purchase of beer, an elderly Fargo man met his demise when he tried walking off with more than he could carry. Mr. Cantine Pinkney, upon seeing the giant cases of Pabst...
FMO Asking: How Safe Do You Feel In North Fargo?
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FMO Asking: How Safe Do You Feel In North Fargo?

June 18th, 2019 | by Johnnny
Fargo, ND – After Fargo’s mayor firmly declared the city to be safe despite some recent fatalities just North of the downtown area, our FM Observer’s man-on-the-street went out to ask some locals living in that...
Big Bird Dead At The Age Of Seventy
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Big Bird Dead At The Age Of Seventy

October 3rd, 2017 | by Johnnny
Sesame Street, NY – The world is mourning the passing of one of its favorite large birds. Big Bird from Sesame Street died in his nest whilst surrounded by his family and close friends at the age of 70, which is like 150 in...
Harambe’s Family To Sue Zoo Who Blew Him To Timbuktu
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Harambe’s Family To Sue Zoo Who Blew Him To Timbuktu

November 18th, 2016 | by Johnnny
Cincinnati, OH – Family members of the recently murdered, captive, and endangered silverback named Harambe (pronounced Harambe) have lawyered up and plan to sue the zoo where Harambe was shot while assisting a young,...