West Fargo Police Searching For Elusive Asian Nudist

June 14th, 2012 | by Bill Burns

West Fargo, ND – One small Asian man is causing quite the ruckus in our growing city of West Fargo, North Dakota and people have started to call the police.

The West Fargo Police Department have stated that they are looking for a nude man who has been showing up all over town.  Several people have called the police department in the last couple months about the nudist running through fields, random backyards, and in one instance, going down slides at random city parks.  Ouch.  That has to hurt.

Officers have had absolutely no luck finding him and have no idea who this man is.  He is simply too elusive.  I would like to name him “The Asian Nudist Ninja” if that is ok?

Police will continue to look for this individual but would like to state that since Asians have such small penises, it is very hard to arrest The Asian Nudist Ninja with indecent exposure because he technically isn’t “exposing” anything.

Please keep an eye out.  If you see a nude man running wildly through your back yard, jumping fences like a gazelle, you are asked to please call the West Fargo Police Department.


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Bill grew up in one of the largest cities in the United States, Maza, North Dakota. Being a cow milker by trade, it was only after stroking thousands upon thousands of cow nipples was he able to save up enough money and move to Fargo, ND. It was here that he joined FM Observer. In his free time he enjoys carving rocking horses out of wood, healing the sick, and running marathons across oceans.