What Came First: The Bad Driver or the Blizzard?

February 19th, 2013 | by Nick
How did this happen?

How did this happen?

Fargo, ND – Every year at this time Old Man Winter flexes his bulging biceps. Snowmageddon wreaks havoc on us all during blizzard season. We give the blizzard a snow prediction, a warning, even a name.

Weather is happening sideways this month, striking angst and fear into the F-M area. Fear that turns to recklessness behind the wheel as we watch multiple-car pileups happen on our highways. Drivers get dumber with each passing snowstorm…or do they? Does the blizzard make us dumber or were we just that dumb to begin with? Let’s break it down…

Inclement weather causes some of us to panic. Panic makes us overreact. When we overreact, we over-correct things. Over-correcting leads to mistakes which lead to accidents while driving.

THEREFORE: Weather=car accidents. Weather caused the stupidity that caused the accident.

HOWEVER: One could argue that the person who overreacted was a horrible driver to begin with. One could say that the snowstorm was merely the jolt they needed to completely lose it and spin out into a ditch.

“You should’ve slowed down! Don’t you know any better??”

NO. They made a small series of poor driving decisions in a short amount of time due to a preexisting condition of poor judgement.

big beard = real smart

big beard = real smart

Two totally different arguments. On one hand, the weather caused you to wreck. On the other hand, poor judgement caused you to wreck. Which argument is correct? Who or what can we blame for that multiple-car pileup?

To find the answers, we asked a guy with a beard:

“People are inherently stupid. The amount of intelligence a person possesses is directly related to the amount in which they choose to learn. So, you see, the answer lies within you. Let me see your palm. Here. Eat this. It will give you the truth you desire.”

Beardo gave me what looked and smelled like illegal drugs.

So there you have it. There is no right or wrong answer− the truth lies within each and every one of us. Those are some words to live by.


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Nick

Co-Founder at FM Observer
Interstrapolating condectistic devariance via opentasmic protensive mindopathy.