May 1st, 2013 | by
Johnnny Barco, NC – The international governing body for barcodes recently unveiled its latest 21st century technology. However, many unprepared shoppers and store workers are already having some serious problems when seeing the...
April 28th, 2013 | by
Cody Marthaller It seems to be, in order to be a successful celebrity, you must join the elite ranks of other celebrities and start claiming nations. You are not considered a gifted celebrity unless you do so and you are certainly not part...
April 18th, 2013 | by
Cody Marthaller The every so annoying One Million Moms Group, decided they still lead pathetic lives and needed something to bitch about. This time around its Kmart’s new ‘Ship My Pants’ commercial. This pathetic group wants...
April 16th, 2013 | by
Nick Palo Alto, CA – Stanford University researchers have been conducting top-secret experiments in an effort to dramatically increase day-to-day smartphone battery longevity. Scientific trials have been performed on lithium-ion...
April 12th, 2013 | by
Bill Burns Due to the large number of incidents involving human beings using weapons to kill other human beings there will now be a ban on being a human being. The state department released a report to Congress recommending a...
April 1st, 2013 | by
Bill Burns Encino, CA – Due to the recent problems within the company, Infinity Ward looks to release multiple call of duties all next month. Infinity Ward has had quite a few internal problems lately. Their first slick move was on...
March 26th, 2013 | by
Nick Denver, CO – First quarter 2013 crime statistics are officially in from the Mile High City, and things are looking up. Violent crime has taken a nose dive compared to past years. Crimes of passion and hate have seen a...
March 21st, 2013 | by
Nick Washington, DC—To the shock and utter disbelief of many, a government program has officially called it quits. The initiative, said to help, prevent and raise awareness of its cause, has gone the way of extinction now that...
March 13th, 2013 | by
Johnnny Alice Springs, Australia – A young VooDoo priest who calls himself Legba (pronounced Leg-Ba) claims he can actually help Planet Earth with its global warming “fever”. Mr. Legba has apparently done some...
March 11th, 2013 | by
Nick Charlotte, NC – Our sporting era is one of constant concern and worry stemming from PED use and the speculation regarding which athlete is cheating and which isn’t. With only one out of the big 3 professional sports...