Local

North Dakota county hopes somebody will run for prosecutor

Cavalier, ND – Pembina county is in need of a lead prosecuting attorney. Amidst political controversy that forced the last county prosecutor out of office, the position has been left vacant for the past couple months. This...

Scheels All Sports To Turn Into Amusement Park. Will Sell Sporting Goods On The Side.

Fargo, ND – Scheels All Sports, the Behemoth of the Midwest, will transform it’s enormous and very popular sports store in Fargo into an amusement park the FM Observer has learned.  Scheels is known for its wide...

Miracle, A Female Peregrine Falcon Returns To Fargo. Husband Missing.

Fargo, ND – Since April, many birds have started their seasonal migration back to the Fargo-Moorhead area.  One of the those birds is a peregrine falcon named Miracle.  Since 2008, Miracle and her mate Dakota Ace have...

Pop singer Madonna extremely satisfied with penis arm implants

Los Angeles, CA – World-renowned pop music singer and diva Madonna was recently asked in an interview about the satisfaction and comfort of her penis arm implants: “I absolutely love them. They fit me so well. They...

Android Gets Instagram. Apple Fans’ Buttholes Hurt.

Fargo, ND – The ever so popular Instagram iPhone application popular among dirty hipsters and dumb fucks in general, was released for Android a couple days ago.  In case you didn’t know how much I love Instagram, you...

Running, Rollerblading, Biking, Hotties, Causing Car Crashes Across The Fargo-Moorhead Area.

Fargo, ND – You can tell spring is finally here as seen by the boners casually sticking out of men’s shorts or the increase of car crashes across the Fargo-Moorhead area.  Fargo-Moorhead has seen a dramatic increase...

Cone Monster signals Construction season has arrived in North Dakota

Fargo, ND – The dawn of spring is upon us in North Dakota. This is a welcome change to the region, but with one humongous downside: ROAD CONSTRUCTION. The ugly orange beast is making his presence felt in a major way this...

A New generation in Moorhead is breaking the librarian stereotype

Moorhead, MN – As I walked into the library, the cool air with a tint of old book smell hit my nose.  It reminded me of my young days in elementary school.  Looking around I could see piles of books stacked up around...

I Don’t Know How To List Something Online Because I’m A Dumbass

Fargo, ND – So you got something you want to get rid of or sell eh?  These days, with the internet, it is so much easier to sell or get rid of something then it ever has before. Everyone has a camera, every phone has...

Cuts are coming to North Dakota State University. Dean Bresciani Faces Tough Decisions.

Fargo, ND – North Dakota State University Head Mafia Boss President Dean Bresciani is facing very VERY tough decisions these days.  This comes after the State Board Of Higher Education denied a request for a half-percent...