Recipes For Success

North Dakota First State To Make Church Attendance Mandatory

Bismarck, ND – The North Dakota legislature has now made attending church on Sunday required by law. The bill which passed unanimously will also give a 10% tithe from each church’s offering plates to the state as a...

Ways To Stay Warm During A North Dakota Winter

West Fargo, ND – We asked all of our FMO team members to brainstorm various ways to stay warm during the dead of winter here near Fargo, North Dakota. We then slowly simmered the list of a hundred ideas down into this Top...

Jason Bourne Moving Back To North Dakota After Learning His Identity

Oakes, ND –  After learning that he lived and grew up in North Dakota prior to having his brain scrambled by the CIA, Jason Bourne has decided to move home again. Jason Bourne: I am very much looking forward to once again...

North Dakota Unveils Its New State Flag

Bismarck, ND – After the Fighting Sioux won their eighth national hockey championship, and with the fifth straight national title for the NDSU Bison football team, North Dakota has decided to change its state flag and...

Delegate To Sue Party Convention Because Nobody Would Caucus With Her

Bismarck, ND – Dorothea Toppen went to the 2016 North Dakota Democrat Convention wanting to caucus but no one would caucus with her. So, Dorothea Toppen is planning on filing a lawsuit against the North Dakota Democrat...

Pinochle Banned In The State Of North Dakota

Bismarck, ND – In its infinite wisdom, the state of North Dakota has banned the game of Pinochle. Based on an anonymous complaint from Mr. Simon DeFalco that some other seasoned citizens were playing Pinochle for untaxed...

Rachel Maddow Announces She’s Running For Governor Of North Dakota

Bismarck, ND – Rachel Maddow has stunned the political world by announcing that she is running for Governor of the great state of North Dakota. Most people know Rachel Maddow as a popular political commentator who hosts the...

Frack Lives Matter Movement Galvanizes In Western North Dakota

Williston, ND – With oil prices tumbling and jobs disappearing, western North Dakotans are channeling their frustration into a powerful, singular message: Frack Lives Matter. Spokesperson Ole Baryll says the once booming...

New ND License Plates Being Recalled Because Fonts Suck

Bismarck, ND – For Immediate Release: Announcement: All of the new North Dakota ‘Sunrise’ license plates are being immediately recalled because: The fonts suck! FMO: Hello? Could you please be a little more...

New ND Governor’s Mansion To Be Way Nicer Than South Dakota’s

Bismarck, ND – North Dakota has finally decided to build a new Governor’s Mansion, since its current one looks like an out-dated, dilapidated, detached garage. The Capitol Grounds Planning Commission basically told...