Tag Archives: bored

Thin Man Found Living Inside Fargo Family’s Chair

A thin man had been living in this chair for 30 years. Police asking folks to check their furniture.

A thin man had been living in this chair for 30 years. Police asking folks to check their furniture.

Fargo, ND – In what police are calling a “very bizarre situation”, a thin elderly man was recently discovered to be living inside a Fargo family’s large comfy chair, which had been in the middle of their living room.

Apparently, after delivering the large, over-stuffed chair to their home thirty years ago, the man decided to crawl inside the chair and stay for awhile.

The man would sneak out at night to get food from the fridge, perhaps stop in the bathroom, and then crawl back inside the chair.

He admits: “During the last thirty years, I sometimes did get rather bored, but then someone would come and sit in the chair, which was always fun for me.”

The Police are now referring to the man as the Chairman of the Bored.

Police are also requesting that everyone in the community please check all your furniture for any unexpected inhabitants who may be living inside.

Downtown Fargo In The Winter

List: Top 10 Things To Do At Home In Fargo During Winter

Fargo, ND – Follow up story to the Top 10 Things To Do In Fargo During Winter.  Here is a list of things you can do in the comfort of your own home during the winter months in Fargo.

 

1. Plan A Kidnapping

When the time comes, you’ll have a solid kidnapping plan in place if you ever need it.

 

2. Practice Your Telekinesis Skills

Once you master it, your fat ass can sit on the couch while you use your newly acquired powers to bring the food to you.

 

3. Hold a 20 Minute Conversation With The Wall

Probably the best conversation you’ll have all week.

 

4. Attempt To Learn Bird Language

Figure out what the birds are really up to.  World domination probably.

 

5. Get Drunk And Start A Fight With Your Stuffed Animals

Your chances of winning are high.  Self-confidence booster.

 

6. Spend The Entire Day With Your Eyes Closed Like A Blind Person

Live like a blind person.  Walking in the middle of the night will be much easier.

 

7. Count The Total Number Of Hairs On Your Arm

This will benefit your math skills.  You’ll finally have an answer for when everyone asks you how many hairs you have on your arm.  Very important statistic to have.

 

8. Create A Facebook Account Of Your Alter Ego

My super hero status just got legit after creating a facebook account of my alter ego.

 

9. Play Dead

Lay at the foot of the stairs and stay there throughout the entire day.  Ask everyone you know to stop by.

 

10. Perform Surgery On Yourself

Play doctor and see if you could make a career out of it on the black market.