Tag Archives: pokemon go

Pokemon Go Trainer Wants Your Ass In His Class

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OmryPeled4

Glef Chryznc: Poketrain with him, or you’re nothing.

Fargo, ND – There is high local demand for Pokegoods and Pokeservices now that the hot new app Pokemon Go has taken America by storm. People of all ages are looking to level-up as they embark on a quest to “catch them all” as quickly as possible. Unfortunately for some, leveling up requires a combination of physical as well as mental ability. The pokemon aren’t going to come to you.

Enter Glef Chryznc. Glef is the sole proprietor of “ChryzPhit” a crossfit gym on the outskirts of town. This gym specializes in crossfit training, but as the need for Poketrainers continues to grow, Glef has decided to moonlight as a Poketrainer at his facility in Northeast Fargo.

His last name also has ZERO vowels, so be confident he can amp your gains.

Poketrainin’ = fun!

Glef will run you through crossfit-ish parkour training to get you up trees and atop buildings. You will also undergo rigorous hand-eye coordination drills that are sure to hone your Pokeskills.

Glef claims he can transform you into a Pokehunting machine in as little as five days. 

The facility is open Monday thru Friday from midnight to noon, then noon to midnight. Weekends hours are 12:00 to midnight. Holiday hours are midnight to midnight.

Grab life by the pokeballs at ChryzPhit!

Hackers Change Pokemon Go Animals Into Satanic Demons

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Demons in your world.

Demons in your Pokeworld?

Fargo, ND – A small number of Android users have become affected by a nefarious hack into the newly-famous Pokemon Go mobile game interface. Certain pokehunters are now encountering demonic hellspawn where cute and adorable Pokemon once were.

Pokemon Go player Plis Kincannix, 15, says “I didn’t sign up to fight demons, but bro, these demons are totally lit. I can shoot pokeballs at ghouls instead of Pikachu until the bug is fixed.”

The hack purportedly affects versions of Android 4.0 and older, so if you’ve been hunting Pokemon with a sucky old suckity-suck phone you might be susceptible.

ISIS and John Mark Karr have both claimed responsibility for the hack.

Pokémon Parents Pleading Please Stop The Insanity

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Pokémon Caption Hier

Pokémon Go Crazy!

West Fargo, ND – After a five year old child was hit by a Mack truck while walking across the interstate highway at midnight, the child’s parents are asking for the insanity to stop.

After a distracted tot climbed into a Cincinnati gorilla pit while doing the Pokémon, the parents are asking for the insanity to stop.

After a young boy turned his bicycle into a Pokémon Go machine and then drove off the edge of a Grand Canyon cliff, parents are asking Pokémon Go to Pokéstop!

A spokémon for the Nintendo company, Diantic Kabushiki, stated that “our new location-based mobile reality game is helping many children get up and go out to try and catch Pokémon in the real world while receiving alerts when a Pokémon is nearby.”

What do you think about Pokémon Go? Do you have any stories or insights into this new phenomenon that is sweeping the country? The FMObserver plans to Poképrobe this hot topic until we clearly know how this Pokéstory ends.