Fargo, ND—An incident involving a member of a local surrogate mother association chapter has our community reeling. Surrogate Mothers United (SMU) Fargo branch saw one of its own taking matters into her own hands, the Observer has learned. Vatchy Lelto-Coppo, an SMU serial donor, reportedly became so fed up with the behavior of one of the branch’s infant donation recipients that she decided to take matters into her own hands.

“Bitch quit payin’ me stipend,” explained Lelto-Coppo, in between heavy drags of vape cig. “I squatted outta kid for this ratchet an’ she just shut me out. Oh hell no, nuh uh bitch.”

Lelto-Coppo is under legal jurisdiction to repossess her surrogate gift, as stated in page 204 of the SMU Donation Contract, which clearly states:

Donor shall receive no more than but no less than one skin-to-skin contact with gestation per week and/or one agreed-upon donation stipend per week, no more than four (4) times per calendar month. If recipient fails to provide either stipend or skin-to-skin for longer than four (4) times a calendar month, donor will be allowed to reclaim gestation.

When the deadbeat parent quit paying both skin-to-skin and her stipend, Lelto-Coppo became enraged and was forced to move forward with the repossession.

The deadbeat ratchet declined to comment.