Everyone who reaches their goal weight will receive a free yo-yo from The Oprah!

Chicago, Illinois – The Oprah is asking for everyone to join Weight Watchers to lose weight along with her.

After having her personal chefs help her balloon up to an astounding 850 pounds, now she is cleverly asking America to join her in dropping some tonnage.

While she loses weight, she and Jabba The Hutt will each be pocketing tons of money since they each own ten percent of Weight Watchers.

Some stupid questions we’d like answered are: How could The Oprah be so overweight if she’s already this involved with the company? What’s her goal weight? 400 pounds? What weight will she balloon up to after this profitable stunt is over? Is Jabba The Hutt also going to try to shed some tonnage?