Tag Archives: courtroom

Full Disclosure: Sean Hannity And Michael Cohen Are Brothers From Another Mother

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DNA proves Sean Hannity and Michael Cohen are half brothers from different mothers.

New York, NY – Thanks to porn star Stormy Daniels, we have now found out that Sean Hannity and Michael Cohen are brothers from another mother.

According to DNA evidence, both men had the same father but each was from a different mother.

Sean Hannity’s maternal DNA points to Margaret Thatcher whilst Michael Cohen’s mother most likely is Janet Reno.

Both women had secret affairs with William F. Buckley Jr. who is then by default believed to be the father of both men.

According to our legal team, since Sean Hannity and Michael Cohen are half brothers, their conversational communications should then have been protected by the brother-brother family privacy privilege, and therefore not admissable in a court of law, so help them God.

Fargo Witch Heading To Trial

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Fargo witchcraft trial headed to court.

Fargo, ND – Deirdre Cummings has been charged in Fargo District Court with three counts of witchcraft, bewitching, and witchery.

Ms. Cummings will soon be on trial for multiple counts of practicing her practice within Fargo city limits which is a fourth class felony under the state’s mandated uniformed citizenry code of ethics.

Her attorney asked Deirdre if she would like a change of venue, to which she replied: “Sure, I can change the venue! I’d be more than happy to change the venue!” which was quietly followed by an echoing evil laughter.

Moments later all the lights in the courtroom immediately changed from being light bulbs to burning candles held by cobwebbed bat-shaped gargoyled sconces.

Deirdre’s pet crow whom she formally addresses as Sheryl is believed to be Head Crow of the Fargo crow flock which is more commonly called “a murder”.

T’is believed that Deirdre Cummings and her pet crow Sheryl have power over all the crows in Fargo so beware anytime you see a crow and please report it to the Fargo Crow Patrol 25/8.

Potential jurors are being asked whether or not they believe in witchcraft. Any non-believers soon find themselves stuck up against the courtroom ceiling, not dissimilar to that unsettling scene in Nightmare on Elm Street.