Tag Archives: mascot

Dickinson Team Name Changing From The Midgets To Just “The Dicks”

For political correctness, the Dickinson Midgets may now be called The Dicks.

Dickinson, ND – The small town of Dickinson, North Dakota was once simply known for being the home town of the famous actress Angie Dickinson.

But now, the Dickinson School Board is in the cross-hairs of a new and extremely flagrant political correctness violation.

The Dickinson mascot and team name of The Midgets has been deemed to be objectionable, abusive, and unacceptable.

School Board president Dr. Sigmond Dickstein, who has suggested changing their name to simply “The Dicks”, asked to hear from some actual midgets to get their input on this matter.

Marty Smaltz of Midgets Of Our Nation (MOON): My organization believes the current Dickinson mascot is not only repugnant and displeasing, but also provocative, humiliating, and derogatory. If you don’t change it, I will change it for you!

Ms. Tina Little who represented L.O.W. (Little Organized Workers): Not only is your team name The Midgets insulting, to me it is very repulsive, disrespectful, reprehensible, offensive, and hurtful.

Gordy Shorts from the Midgets Of America Network (MOAN): Besides being indecent and demeaning because of its ties to historical circus freak shows, I consider your team name to be rude, distasteful, vulgar, crude, and quite frankly…embarrassing.

After a short break, Dr. Sigmond Dickstein (whose name can be re-arranged to spell Dickinson Midgets) said that the Dickinson School Board will need a little time to decide their final decision on this matter which is of no small importance to the tiny town of Dickinson, which is dwarfed by neighboring Bismarck.

Former Vikings Mascot Now With Green Bay Packers

Ragnar and Rogers team up!

Ragnar and Rodgers happy to team up!

Green Bay, WI – After being let go by the Minisoda ViQueens, Ragnar has signed a lucrative contract with the Green Gay Packers.

Mascot Ragnar was recently let go by the ViQueens for “megalomaniacal insubordination” and asking for too much money.

Ragnar’s agent, Celedor Galbassi, said: “Ragnar thought he was asking for a reasonable raise based on his senior status amongst all the other NFL team mascots.”

The Packers were quick to offer Ragnar a sweet benefits package that he could not refuse, including a nice pay raise and all the free cheese he and his family can eat.

Mr. Galbassi did mention that Ragnar will have to paint his motorcycle gold and dark green, and also wear a cheesehead instead of the old horns.