Tag Archives: milkshakes

Joaquin Phoenix’s “Cries Of Anguish” Wins The Oscar For Best Picture

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The next time you pour milk on your cereal, think of the calf who should have gotten that milk.

Hollywood, CA – As expected, Joaquin Phoenix’s movie Cries Of Anguish won the Academy Award for Best Picture.

Cries Of Anguish is a wonderful movie about cows being artificially inseminated.

Then, the cow babies are stolen from their mommy cows for the veal industry, which prompts unmistakable Cries Of Anguish.

All of the stolen milk, which should have gone to the baby cows, is taken from the mommies, only to be put into our cups of coffee and onto cereal in your cereal bowl.

Joaquin Phoenix, in his powerfully delivered acceptance speech, showed that he is no joker when it comes to pointing out the wrongful entitlement that humans feel in order to inflict such violent acts against our bovine friends.

Milkshakes A Great Way To Add Poundage

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Why just have one chocolate milkshake when you can just as easily have two?!

Why have one chocolate milkshake when you can just as easily have two?!

West Fargo, ND – Are you underweight and trying to put on a few extra pounds to increase your gravitas? Are you tired of being bullied by some thin man up in the bully pulpit?

Milkshakes have been found to be an excellent way to add those desired pounds while enjoying every sip of the process.

As a public service, some of us at the FMObserver took it upon ourselves to test all the chocolate milkshakes available in the Fargo-Moorhead area.

Based on the number of calories per milkshake along with the overall flavor and thickness, we were going to list the names of the places we recommend most.

We even went so far as to do a Double Blind study where we each ordered two (2) chocolate milkshakes from each establishment and drank them while wearing a blindfold.

Interestingly, we found that we could cheaply make great milkshakes in the privacy of our own homes by using vanilla ice cream, whole milk, and Hersey’s chocolate syrup, where we didn’t even need to limit ourselves to two per sitting.

In conclusion: We can report that consuming at least two chocolate milkshakes per meal for at least two months is certainly a good way to add some extra needed weight when possibly bulking up for fall football, trying to qualify for the Biggest Loser Show, or just wanting to command more respect when you walk into a room full of thin people who maybe have not yet heard about your awesomely effective milkshake diet.