Tag Archives: retro

FMO Hiring Senior Retro-Tech Position To Service All Our Older Equipment

Knowledge of older equipment is a plus.

Eastern West Fargo, in Southeastern North Dakota – The FM Observer is proud to announce that we are interested in hiring a Senior Retro-Tech to our staff of Information Technologists.

Candidates must be willing to work in a slow-paced environment and be able to handle extreme pressure well.

Must be willing and able to work days and nights and also weekends and holidays for little or no compensation.

You should be able to take things apart and then put them back together.

Successful applicants would be expected to respectfully stand at attention with hand on heart during the national anthem and our daily pledge of allegiance.

Willingness to participant in office sports betting pools and bring in cookies would be a big plus.

Knowledge of all older types of retro-equipment which has a lot of knobs and buttons would be helpful since that it pretty much your main responsibility.

Candidate should be able to zoom in and zoom out when needed.

Language skills preferably would include English and Spanish as a first or second language, profanity, and also a basic understanding of office notes written in Tamil.

Must be willing to relocate if we ever decide to move or take the entire company on an “extended vacation” due to Global Cooling or problems with local law enforcement.

We are looking for a team player who is willing to be proactive and approachable.

You should be able to set positive goals that are achievable.

Having good time management skills is welcome as is being able to quickly respond to an emergency situation of any kind.

We are looking for someone who can prioritize many tasks as to their urgency and importance, re-think existing processes, educate yourself on the latest retro-technology, and ask questions when the answers may not be right in front of you.

If you feel your particular skill set is what the FM Observer is looking for, print multiple copies of your one-page resume in Tamil (using Google Translate if needed), and put one copy in each of our In-Box folders on our desks when we’re out to lunch (which is pretty much the whole day).

Dirk Benedict Steel Stomachs

Yes.  This is for real.  I don’t know about workouts but these make for some awesome dance moves.

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