Pimp Academy opening in downtown Fargo

Fargo, ND – A young, flashy entrepreneur is bringing his tacky-yet-unapologetic business local. Ricky Duffman, CFO of Vandelay Industries, (the developer of a very lucrative smartphone app) has taken to the streets of lonely old Fargo to chase his ultimate dream. What is his ultimate dream, you ask? The proliferation of Pimp Nation. Duffman is getting the paperwork together to open Fargo’s first and only Pimp Academy.

Bishop Duff’s Academy of Pimp, or B-DAP as it shall be known henceforth, will be a come-one-come-all school of Pimpology. According to Duffman, B-DAP will provide a series of learning seminars geared to educate eager, young, inexperienced pimps. It will not only be aimed at street pimps, but pimps of a different nature. Mr. Duffman breaks it down:

“I’m gonna be educatin’ peeps young and old on how to best pimp. Don’t matter if you wanna pimp hoes, your friends, or your job and whatnot. Pimps wear many different hats. Bill Gates? He’s a pimp. Bishop Don Magic Juan? Also a pimp. Hillary Clinton? Huge pimp. See, pimpin’ ain’t only about hoes anymore. Pimpin’ is all around us.”

Duffman is all set to move in to the vacant suite across from the Subway in downtown Fargo. The Observer would like to wish Duffman best of luck with his new business and the proliferation of Pimp Nation.