Tag Archives: business

Fargo Lobster Bisque Company Goes Belly Up Due To Lack Of Local Lobsters

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It would’ve been real nice to have a Lobster Bisque company here in Fargo but apparently they forgot the Feasibility Study.

Fargo, ND – Even before it officially opened its doors for business, the Fargo Lobster Bisque Company is officially closing its doors.

Selbo Berquist is the owner of the already defunct Fargo Lobster Bisque Company who now admits: “Yeah, we prolly forgot to do our due diligence and go with the highly recommended Feasibility Study which prolly would’ve red flagged us to the fact that Fargo does not have a large lobster population living in the area.”

So what are Mr. Berquist’s plans for the future?

“Well, we have heard the Minnesota lakes area is starting to produce a plethora of zebra mussels so we are prolly looking into re-packaging ourselves in that general direction,” Selbo ponders. 

Ironically, all the lobsters in Selbo Berquist can bisquely be re-arranged to spell: Lobster Bisque!

National Coffee Shortage Causing Companies To Hoard The ‘Fuel Of Business’

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Sip it while you can because coffee’s days are numbered, just as Algore predicted.

Coffee City, TX – Large and small businesses all across America have begun to hoard coffee in anticipation of a nation-wide shortage due to Global Warming due to Algore’s changing climate.

With coffee in short supply, the speed of business in America could slow to just a trickle.

Mr. Schaffer Gootee who heads up the Coffee Utilization Program (CUP) describes coffee as the “fuel of business“ and without it, American business would come to a decaffinated halt.

Do you drink coffee at home? Do you have a six month supply hoarded in your pantry? This is what the experts are warning us to do if you like to wake to the smell of fresh-brewed coffee in the morning.

Ironically, all the letters in Schaffer Gootee can be re-arranged to spell: Coffee Shortage!