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Charles Barkley Helps FMO Readers With March Madness

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Unlike college, you have to do your own homework for March Madness!

Basketball, USA – Your FM Observer has asked our friend Sir Charles Barkley to help our loyal readers with their March Madness bracketology.

FMO: Sir Charles, how can you tell the difference between a winning team and a losing team?
CB: ​Well, the main difference between a winner and a loser is if they win or not.

FMO: How does this year’s tournament compare with previous ones?
CB: I think this is the hardest tournament to predict because we don’t know any of the results yet.

FMO: Why is it so difficult to pick all the winners correctly?
CB: Because the number of different combinations of winning teams is way up in the thousands.

FMO: What is the main “IF” in a basketball game?
CB: Some say “IF” is the injury factor, but I say if ifs were gifts, every day would be Christmas.

FMO: Do you have a message for the NDSU Bison fans?
CB: The best way for your Bison to do well is to use the power of the herd, by stampeding the competition down into the ground, and never look back.

March Madness 2013

One Thing About March Madness That Annoys Me

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March Madness 2013Dunks.

Dunks you say?  Yes dunks.  A lot of these dunks I’ve seen while watching March Madness have left me shaking my head at times.

Everytime someone dunks the crowd oozes in excitement and the teams bench goes crazy.  Some guy dunks and the crowd goes, “ohhhhhhhh nah he didn’t.”  Oh..oh he did.

Why would dunks annoy you you ask?  Well, because the dude is usually 6ft 8.  All they need to do is hop and they pretty much dunk it.  Trip?  It’s a dunk.  Accidental sneeze?  Slam flying dunk.  You ever play basketball with your little niece or nephews or whatnot where everyone is shorter then you?  Well that’s pretty much these guys.  I can dunk.  I can school every little kid at basketball any time I want I’m that good.  I’ll dunk over them any day of the week.  They got NOTHING on me.

Basically these centers are just tall and stand there quite a bit.  Here is how the recruitment process goes.  “Hey you’re really tall.  Would you like a college scholarship to be tall and hop dunk some balls in?  Yes?  Greeeeaaaaat.”

If I see someone that is 6ft 3 or under dunk it then I’m impressed.  Anyone else, you’re that guy playing the nieces and nephews.  Do your dunk and slowly jog on over to the other side of the court there buddy.  They need your blocking ability.  Or just your large human mass to stand there with your hands up.