Tag Archives: not fake

Winter Holiday Greetings From Your FM Observer

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For all you Protestants, protest signs like this can be made at Acme dot com slash Chumaker

Southern North Pole – Since saying Merry Christmas is possibly offensive to some, we here at the FM Observer Headquarters want to wish all our faithful readers very warm Winter Holiday greetings, to hopefully help counteract the recent Global Cooling which seems to have overtaken our area thanks to carbon-taxing Algore.

The FM Observer was boldly begun about six years ago by co-founders Cody and Nick, who simply wanted to provide an alternative to all the bad, real news. Cody is sadly no longer with us. Nick is related to Jolly Old St. Nick, who happens to be our Nick’s God-Santa.

After six long years of being at the vanguard of exclusively satirical fake news, we have unfortunately (for some) decided to renew our contract for another six years.

So, for any folks who wished we would just go away like Al Franken is from the Senate…no, we are here to stay – just like Robert Mueller’s never-ending special investigation into possible collusion with the Russians.

Acme.com/Chumaker

Winter Snow Predictions Now Called ‘Flake News’

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Big Foot seen here walking streets of Fargo during recent blizzard.

Fargo, ND – National weather experts will now be referring to any and all snowfall predictions in the future as Flake News in order to keep up with the changing times and tweets.

The most recent example of Flake News for our particular area is that a half a foot (known as a SmallFoot, as opposed to BigFoot) of snow, accompanied by near-hurricane force winds, has been ordered by Algore to hit North Dakota to help keep out the Riff-Raff here.

Consider the FM Observer your Flake News headquarters as we have many meteorologists on our growing staff that not only like to study meteors but also love predicting snowfall forecasts especially when it comes in the form of horizontally-blowing blizzard snowflakes.

We here at the FM Observer would also like to encourage our readers to be proactive and get outside to do some Pre-Shoveling ahead of any major Flake News.

Fargo Man Becomes Very Attached To His Brick

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My brick is always there for me, it’s real, and makes a great companion.

Fargo, ND – One fine day, Mr. Wade Dumpkins was out for his walk when he came upon a single solitary brick laying on the ground at the edge of an abandoned construction site.

After carefully looking around, Mr. Dumpkins picked up the brick and then decided to carry it home with him.

Mr. Wade Dumpkins has now been taking this brick pretty much everywhere he goes for the last twenty five years.

I love my brick. Isn’t that all that matters?

“It’s become my companion, my best friend, my rock, if you will,” admits Wade, as he lovingly hold his brick in his lap.

“When so much today is not real, like all that fake news on Facebook that caused Hillary to lose it, this orphaned simple brick that I found is something real, dammit, something tangible, someone who is always there for me, do you know what I’m saying?”

Yes, Wade Dumpkins, we do know what you’re saying!