Tag Archives: peachy

The White House’s Twelve Days Of Impeachment Calendar Is The Latest Trending Christmas Gift

Gradually open twelve White House windows to mark the twelve days of impeachment.

Washington, DC – First lady Melania is offering a superbly wonderful gift idea for the holidays.

Melania’s Twelve Days Of Impeachment Calendar is an impeccably designed likeness of the White House with twelve adorable little windows that can be opened one per day.

Share the magic of the impeachment process with your family as more and more windows light up.

Since the First Lady fluently speaks six languages, the twelve impeachment windows when opened each announce a different special message in all six of Melania’s spoken languages: English, French, German, Italian, Slovenian, and Serbo-Croatian.

If you’re looking to give the latest hotly trending gift for Christmas, consider Melania’s Twelve Days Of Impeachment Calendar.

Melania in her own words:
French: Ce calendrier de destitution est précieusement divin.
German: Dieser Amtsenthebungskalender ist von unschätzbarem Wert.
Italian: Questo calendario dell’impeachment è preziosamente divino.
Slovenian: Ta koledar obstoja je dragoceno božanski.
Serbo-Croatian: Ovaj kalendar imepmenta je dragocjen božanski.
English: This impeachment calendar is preciously divine.

Elderly Man Dies Peacefully At Home After Family Tells Him Trump Was Impeached

Impeach is the new favorite ice cream flavor in many blue states.

West Fargo, ND – Surrounded by family, close friends, and a few random strangers, Mr. Patrum McPhie let himself go toward the light after hearing the news that President Trump had just been impeached.

Dr. Mutch Pimpare who was acting as spokesperson for the motley group, said they believed it was the best thing to offer up the fake news to the family’s dying patriarch that President Trump had just been impeached so that Mr. McPhie could just relax and go in peace.

Ironically, both Mutch Pimpare and Patrum McPhie can somehow be magically re-arranged to spell: Impeach Trump!