When trick or treating, don’t forget the cemetery.
Fargo, ND – Dr. Headstone of the Halloween Educational Literary Library Organization (HELLO) is reminding children who want to have a full trick or treating experience to not forget to take a slow walk through the local cemetery.
“It is often the last place one thinks of but is really the first place you ought to go when seeking to enjoy a genuine, old-fashioned, Halloween fright night,” opines Dr. Headstone whilst puffing on his old bone pipe.
Dr. Headstone reminds us that Halloween is more than putting on a Trump mask and compiling copious amounts of candy.
“It is the one holiday we have that truly commemorates the dead, and how better to do that than by taking a nice, long, spooky stroll through a foggy cemetery.”
Spookhouse to provide Care & Scare
Fargo, ND – A new theme park-style daycare service will soon be opening in Fargo.
Spookhouse Daycare will provide excellently creepy care for today’s modern youth.
Everything about Spookhouse Daycare will have a very scary edge to it.
Eerie music and bloodcurdling sounds will be continuously piped in.
Feral black cats will roam the haunted premises.
Dimly-lit bathrooms will have special blacklight 3-D goblins jumping out of nowhere.
Staff workers will dress up like graveyard ghouls and read classic ghost stories to the children at the bottom of every hour.
Spookhouse director Egore Hunchback says: “It’s going to be terrifyingly awesome!”
Other daycare themes soon to be available from the Kids-R-Us Corporation: Bootcamp, Octogon, Transgender, Waterworld, Prison, and The Moon.