Tag Archives: double

Lucky Local Mormon Groom Successfully Marries Identical Twin Sister Brides

Plurality is reality.

East Fargo, ND – April means floods and also the official beginning of wedding season!

One of the first weddings of the year turned out to be a real doozy: In true Mormon fashion, Lorenzo Snow entered into eternal matrimony with Josetta and Yosetta Pettibone, who are identical twin sisters from Pettibone, ND.

In true Mormon fashion, the multi-marriage was solemnized and sealed by temple covenant. During the bonding ordinance, wedding music was provided by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

Polygamy (or polygyny) is arguably legal if practiced under the umbrella of religious freedom of expression. A Mormon plural marriage is kosher as long as it is directly authorized by revelation from God through the living prophet.

Lorenzo Snow and his wives will live as Pettibone ruralists while being marriage pluralists and studying to be massage therapists.

What you’re probably thinking is that plurality in its totality has a personality of normality as long as a formality gives it the legality of morality in the commonality of a technicality.

After being bonded by temple covenant, wedding reception dance music was provided by the Seer Stones.

New Game Show Called “Double Jeopardy” Features Twins Acquitted Of A Crime But Then Tried Again For Exact Same Crime

Double Jeopardy is a double hit!

Hollywood, CA – A new game show is being added to your “must-see” TV entertainment line-up and it’s called Double Jeopardy!

It is part game show and part court-room drama in which twins once acquitted of a crime are possibly retried for the same crime.

The host of the new show is Mr. Perky Parker: “Double Jeopardy is really going to be a great show! I hope you and your entire family watch it every week so I can keep my job during this down-tick in the stock market.”

If you’re a pair of twins who were once acquitted of a crime, and would like to be on the show for a chance to win some taxable cash, simply contact Mr. Perky Parker and have all your relevant information handy.

Oh, and don’t forget to tune in to watch Double Jeopardy!

Fargo Band Selected To Perform During Halftime Of Next Super Bowl

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Double Negative is not expected to not perform during halftime of Super Bowl 51!

Fargo, ND – The ever-popular Fargo band “Double Negative” has just been chosen to play during the halftime of Super Bowl 52!

Even though the news came as quite a surprise, the seasoned band members all took it in stride.

Lead singer Mattie Guzman: “At first, we thought we didn’t have what it takes, but that attitude won’t get you nowhere.”

Guitar and saxophone player Tony Malone: “We can’t not be any worse than Coldplay was.”

Drummer Jimmy Chambers: “We haven’t never played for an event as big as the Super Bowl.”

Keyboardist Garland Gendron: “Nobody with any sense isn’t going to miss playing this gig.”

Bass player Adam Stokes: “I don’t not think this is a very, very big deal!”

Some of the songs that Double Negative often plays at gigs in Fargo include:

I Can’t Get No Satisfaction
We Don’t Need No Education
Ain’t No Mountain High Enough

Some of the songs written by Double Negative and which you can expect to hear during halftime of Super Bowl 51 are:

That Won’t Do You No Good
I Ain’t Got No Time For You
She Never Kisses Nobody