Tag Archives: gang

Gang Signs Causing Fights Between Rival Retirement Homes

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Some retirement homes in Fargo are “not to be messed with” due to suspicious gang activities.

Fargo, ND – Apparently residents of opposing retirement homes in the Fargo area have been flashing gang signs back and forth at each other to the point where it has become “problematical”.

Police reports indicate that residents of Death Valley Retirement Home have been ramping up tensions between themselves and their opposition gang which resides at Purgatory Senior Living.

“We’re not sure how this whole thing got started but we do know it cannot keep on escalating like it has been without a bloody full-blown gang fight breaking out sometime soon,” offers Police officer Lt. Greg Greeno, who’s been assigned to this case.

Retirement home managers are considering searching resident rooms in search of weapons that could be used in a gang fight such as wooden spoons, rolled up newspapers, and even toothbrushes.

For now, you are being asked to stay away from Death Valley Retirement Home as well as Purgatory Senior Living until tensions can be ratcheted down a bit.

If you are going to visit a loved one who happens to be a gang member at one of these retirement homes, please pay attention to any gang signs you observe during your visit and report them immediately to the authorities.

New Fargo Motorcycle Gang Called ‘Hell Monkeys’

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Fargo cautiously welcomes The Hell Monkeys to town.

Fargo, ND – Whether it likes it or not, Fargo now has a new motorcycle gang with which to contend.

The Hell Monkeys are their name and they claim to be more fun than a barrel of monkeys.

Hell Monkey members tend to emulate one another because: monkey see, monkey do.

They purportedly only deal with monkey business that may or may not land them behind monkey bars.

Fargo Police might throw a monkey wrench into their plans if The Hell Monkeys decide to monkey around any laws.

The gang’s leader is named Bingo – a grease monkey by trade, a beer monkey during the evenings, a monkeyshine on the weekends, and a monkey’s uncle to Bubbles who lived at Neverland Ranch with Michael’s Jackson.

The Hell Monkey motto is “see no evil, speak no evil, hear no evil” which includes disregarding all speed limits since they cannot read street signs.

The gang concurs with the old saying: if you pay peanuts, you get chunky monkeys but if you don’t pay any peanuts, you get angry monkeys.

They are also warning Fargo residents to never monkey with another monkey’s monkey.

If you ever need to get a monkey off your back, you may need to monkey up and do the monkey hustle with some fresh bananas, lest one or more gang members go ape on you.