Recipes For Success

UND Football Team Adds Moose As Running Back To Roster In Effort To Beat The Bison

Grand Forks, ND – In a last ditch effort to topple the NDSU Bison football team, the UND former Fighting Sioux have enlisted the help of an almost unstoppable running back. As you might expect, his name is Bullwinkle and...

​Wealthy Benefactor Offers Conditional Money For Two Red River Valley Counties

Las Vegas, NV – King Poladian Cordeiro of Cyprus has announced a conditional offering of very large sums of money for two lucky counties in the Red River Valley of the North. King Cordeiro of Cyprus is offering Cass County...

Emergency Counselors Now Available For Problematic Family Situations

Moorhead, MN – Summer means fun and family getogethers which can also lead to domestic disharmonies. A new governMental agency called Family Emergency Counseling Extra Services (or FECES) is now here to help with an...

Woman Suing Hot Sauce For Being Too Hot

Hot Springs, SD – An angry elderly woman is suing the makers of a hot sauce called The Ghost for being too darn hot! Ms. Osucha Hogsett claims that after putting just a small portion of The Ghost hot sauce on her enchilada,...

Heidi Heitkamp And Kevin Cramer Agree To Three UFC-Style Octagon Fights

Bismarck, ND – Heidi Heitkamp and Kevin Cramer, who are both fighting for the same Senate seat, will meet three times prior to the election in order to help undecided voters make their choice. Their campaigns have agreed...

Pope Clarifies: There Is A Hell, Otherwise Known As Grand Forks

Vaticano, Italy – The Pope admits God may have had it wrong when telling the Pope that there is no Hell. When asked recently about his comments that sinners just disappear and that there is no Hell, The Pope is now saying...

New UND Mascot Needs A Name!

Grand Forks, UND – It’s time once again to put on your politically correct thinking caps to help name UND’s chosen mascot. The winner of the mascot naming contest could possibly win a trip to Grand Forks (and...

Downtown Fargo Adding Another Bar In An Attempt To Increase Crime And Number Of Drunks

Fargo, ND – As if there wasn’t already enough crime and drunks in the Downtown Fargo area, the addition of a new bar should get those social parameters up to acceptable levels. Instead of adding much-needed parking...

Tsunami False Alarm Issued For State Of North Dakota

Bismarck, ND – Even though it did seem a bit odd at the time, a Tsunami Warning was issued for the entire state of North Dakota. Without thinking, many folks in North Dakota did have a panicky knee-jerk reaction to the...

Fargo Man Suing Hospital For Mistakenly Removing His Novanoid

Fargo, ND – After having his novanoid removed erroneously by a distracted surgeon, Donovan Ion is lawyering up to sioux the hospital. The surgeon-at-fault admits he may have been sexting during the botched operation but...