January 16th, 2020 | by
Johnnny Washington, DC – Before swearing in all the members of the Senate for the impeachment trial of President Trump, Chief Justice John Roberts had to first swear in himself according to some archaic constitutional protocols....
January 15th, 2020 | by
Johnnny Washington, DC – Sadly, the long-running soap opera Days Of Our Lives which began in 1965 will soon be terminating due to lack of interest. However, in its place will be another long-running soap opera called Endless...
August 26th, 2019 | by
Johnnny Nuuk, Greenland – President Trump has made the decision to trade the state of California to Denmark in exchange for Greenland. “I made a really great deal, because that’s what I do, and in exchange for...
March 15th, 2019 | by
Johnnny Washington, DC – Nervous Democrats needing a win in the next presidential election are pushing to lower the voting age to ten while offering children free candy and recreational marijuana. Speaker Nancy Pelosi believes...
August 24th, 2018 | by
Johnnny Buffalo, ND – After being raised by a large family of buffalo as a young child, a North Dakota man is ready to represent his state in Washington, DC. Joe Tatanka, who now wallows in the town of Buffalo, North Dakota,...
July 17th, 2018 | by
Johnnny Bismarck, ND – Heidi Heitkamp and Kevin Cramer, who are both fighting for the same Senate seat, will meet three times prior to the election in order to help undecided voters make their choice. Their campaigns have agreed...
October 22nd, 2015 | by
Johnnny Capitol Hill, DC – Our chief Washington correspondent, Mr. Ben Ghazi, was lucky enough be present while President-Elect Hillary Clinton got brutally questioned by mean, extremist, Republican members of Congress. FMO’s...
September 27th, 2015 | by
Johnnny New York, NY – In preparation for his upcoming presidency, Donald Trump is already making some big changes. On Friday, the Trumpster told House Speaker John Boehner, “You’re Fired!”. Now, whenever...
April 12th, 2013 | by
Bill Burns Due to the large number of incidents involving human beings using weapons to kill other human beings there will now be a ban on being a human being. The state department released a report to Congress recommending a...
