Recipes For Success

President Trump To Swap The Blue State Of California For Greenland
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President Trump To Swap The Blue State Of California For Greenland

August 26th, 2019 | by Johnnny
Nuuk, Greenland – President Trump has made the decision to trade the state of California to Denmark in exchange for Greenland. “I made a really great deal, because that’s what I do, and in exchange for...
Peter Pan Claims He Was Abused By Michael Jackson, Until Tinker Bell Found Out!
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Peter Pan Claims He Was Abused By Michael Jackson, Until Tinker Bell Found Out!

March 25th, 2019 | by Johnnny
Neverland, CA – The real Peter Pan is now alleging that the late Michael Jackson sexually abused him in Neverland. Michael Jackson is posthumously arguing that it...
Jeff Sessions Voted Most Out-Of-Touch Person In America
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Jeff Sessions Voted Most Out-Of-Touch Person In America

January 7th, 2018 | by Johnnny
Denver, CO – Attorney General Jeff Sessions has just been voted the Most Out-Of-Touch Person in the USA by the Common Sense Club. By his recent decision to rescind the James Cole Memo, AG Sessions is basically telling U.S....
Obama Pens Exec Order Forcing All States To Raise Min Wage To $30/Hour By 2040
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Obama Pens Exec Order Forcing All States To Raise Min Wage To $30/Hour By 2040

April 5th, 2016 | by Johnnny
Washington, DC – Not to be outdone by Governor Jerry Brown in California, President Obama just signed into law via another Executive Order, a new law which mandates that all 57 states increase their minimum wage to $30 per...
Project Update for the FM Diversion
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Project Update for the FM Diversion

March 3rd, 2016 | by Jake
Fargo, ND – Ralph Malph, a local busboy, informed us at the FM Observer that a huge change is coming to the controversial FM Diversion. Ralph was working his usual tables and overheard a city official discussing top secret...
California Drought To Be Quickly Replaced By Giant Mudslides
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California Drought To Be Quickly Replaced By Giant Mudslides

January 6th, 2016 | by Johnnny
Rio Linda, CA – The Good News is that the California drought will soon be over. The Bad News is that the state will soon be one gigantic mudslide. Climatologists at our FMObserver headquarters now believe that California...
Drought-Stricken California Looking To Dip Into Swimming Pools
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Drought-Stricken California Looking To Dip Into Swimming Pools

April 9th, 2015 | by Johnnny
Drytown, CA – As California continues to suffer from its worst drought since their last bad drought, the California Water Authority is searching for ways to deal with the problem. It’s so dry in California that the...
Hundreds Of Misguided Bison Fans Mistakenly Went To San Francisco
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Hundreds Of Misguided Bison Fans Mistakenly Went To San Francisco

January 9th, 2015 | by Johnnny
San Francisco, CA – Some Bison football fans taking buses to the Big Game in Frisco ended up taking a very wrong turn. A convoy of four buses full of Bison fans had gotten as far as Omaha, Nebraska when one of the bus...
Painfully Normal Guy Discovered Living In Los Angeles
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Painfully Normal Guy Discovered Living In Los Angeles

May 15th, 2013 | by Nick
Los Angeles, CA—SoCal. L.A. Paradise City. The coolest city with the coolest people with the best weather. You gotta be a badass, actor, musician, beautiful person or an otherwise famous celebrity to live there…or so we...
Pair of lungs or some other organ found on LA sidewalk
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Pair of lungs or some other organ found on LA sidewalk

June 12th, 2012 | by Nick
Los Angeles, CA – Sunday evening, authorities received a call to investigate what was reported to be a pair of lungs stuck to a south Los Angeles county sidewalk. With a veritable frenzy of visceral criminal activity...