Tag Archives: executive order

Obama Pens Exec Order Forcing All States To Raise Min Wage To $30/Hour By 2040

I can do whatever I want because I have all these pens.

I can do whatever I want because I am President and I have all these pens.

Washington, DC – Not to be outdone by Governor Jerry Brown in California, President Obama just signed into law via another Executive Order, a new law which mandates that all 57 states increase their minimum wage to $30 per hour by the year 2040.

If that seems like a big increase, the President defends it by pointing out that it’s less than a dollar per year: “It comes out to only 83.3 cents per year, aaaand, I would bet that most people have 83 cents underneath their couch cushions”, says Obama.

But what about the issue of Big Government dictating yet another unfunded mandate to the private sector which in reality will cause many businesses to cut staff or even close their doors permanently?

To that, the President retorts: “Big Government is always willing to help. In this case, we can provide another bail-out program to assist struggling businesses, or with the stroke of my pens, I can sign another Executive Order which will disallow businesses to cut staff aaaand permanently close their doors.”

Tax On Christmas Trees To Go Directly To Obama Retirement Fund

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Triple the cost = Triple the joy

Christmas, FL – It’s about that time of year again to go buy a Christmas tree for your ho-ho-home.

Most of Santa’s helpers will be purchasing a real tree, that died for your sins.

Others will be bringing home an artificial tree made from unknown toxic chemicals in some polluted Chinese factory.

Either way, expect the final cost of your Christmas tree to be tripled thanks to President Obama’s Christmas Tree Tax.

Here’s how it works: Let’s say¬†for example, a Christmas tree that normally would have cost $50 will now only cost you a mere $150.

In the name of Climate Change, this past executive order by former President Obama will provide him and his family a nice, much-needed, and much-deserved Christmas bonus each and every Christmas for the rest of their lives.