January 15th, 2020 | by
Johnnny Washington, DC – Sadly, the long-running soap opera Days Of Our Lives which began in 1965 will soon be terminating due to lack of interest. However, in its place will be another long-running soap opera called Endless...
November 13th, 2019 | by
Johnnny Swamp City, DC – On Day One of the House Impeachment Inquiry of President Trump, Chairman Adam Schiff ordered an abundance of luncheon pizza for the Democrats on the committee but did not allow the Republicans to order or...
August 24th, 2018 | by
Johnnny Buffalo, ND – After being raised by a large family of buffalo as a young child, a North Dakota man is ready to represent his state in Washington, DC. Joe Tatanka, who now wallows in the town of Buffalo, North Dakota,...
January 9th, 2018 | by
Johnnny Fargo, ND – In a community-wide frenzied effort to get all cars washed prior to the return of Algore’s Polar Vortex, every car wash is expecting a record-breaking day. Lines into car washes could be so long that...
February 23rd, 2017 | by
Johnnny Washington, DC – Breaking from long-standing tradition once again, instead of introducing a new First Dog to the country as most presidents have done in the past, President Donald Trump and his First Family will be...
October 22nd, 2015 | by
Johnnny Capitol Hill, DC – Our chief Washington correspondent, Mr. Ben Ghazi, was lucky enough be present while President-Elect Hillary Clinton got brutally questioned by mean, extremist, Republican members of Congress. FMO’s...
April 14th, 2014 | by
Kitz Washington, D.C. – A new cosmetic surgery trend is sweeping the nation’s capital. Tear duct implants, also known as “Sad Sacs”, are becoming increasingly popular among politicians whose inability to...
May 6th, 2013 | by
Johnnny Washington, DC – Well, it looks like the home of Political Correctness is about to get a dose of its own medicine. The name Washington Redskins, which goes back to 1937, has now become the latest target of easily-offended...
November 14th, 2012 | by
Bill Burns Battle Creek, MI – In the wake of the recent election, Kellogg’s plans to release a brand new product line specifically for the states of Colorado and Washington. For the supporters of marijuana, it was a historic...