House Intelligence Committee Chairman Adam Schiff doesn’t allow Republicans to have any pizza.
Swamp City, DC – On Day One of the House Impeachment Inquiry of President Trump, Chairman Adam Schiff ordered an abundance of luncheon pizza for the Democrats on the committee but did not allow the Republicans to order or have any pizza.
Ranking minority member Devin Nunes fretfully asked Chairman Schiff why the Republicans were not allowed to have any of the Democratic pizza, or even just to be able to order any pizza for themselves.
The stoically rigid chairman of the House Intelligence Committee responded by saying that the minority party does not have the power to order any pizza for lunch, nor have the right to share in any of the Majority’s pizza-fest.
When the Republican members asked what lunch options they had, Adam Schiff explained that any written requests the Republicans submitted to the committee would eventually be considered by the Majority party…in a secret closed session.
Brainerd, MN – Recent scientific studies show that people who are wanting to collect cardboard boxes in order to store all their belongings in such an organized fashion is a sign of a much higher intellect.
Dr. Debra Brosco-Dax who headed up these studies says that “our findings indicate that wanting to organize things in a collection of boxes is duplicating how intelligent brains organize massive amounts of information in one’s brain.”
The bottom-line take-away of Dr. Brosco-Dax’s research is:
If you are a person who likes to collect cardboard boxes and subsequently use them to store all your personal items, continue to do so knowing full well that you are amongst the smartest people in your community.
If saving cardboard boxes and eventually using them to get all your things organized is not your cup of tea, consider starting to follow in the footsteps of those who do, so as to at least give the outward appearance that you possess a high IQ.
If there is someone at your workplace who is constantly wanting to save boxes, begin to think of this person as one of the smarter ones in your group, and possibly ask that person to mentor you so that you can begin to follow them down the path of wisdom.
Ironically, all the letters in Debra Brosco-Dax can be re-organized to spell: Cardboard Boxes!