Tag Archives: polling station

Top Ten Reasons Why The City Of Moorhead Secretly Changed Its Voting Locations

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Good luck trying to find where to vote if you live in Moorhead!

Moorhead, MN – Without letting anyone know, Moorhead city leaders decided to change many of their polling locations.

Many Moorheadians are now wondering why their silly little town would change many of its polling locations without notifying its citizenry.

If you’re looking for reasons, here are some good ones that would explain the odd behavior of the City Council Leaders in this quirky small Minisoda village.

Top 10 Reasons Moorhead Changed Where To Vote:

10. Didn’t think college kids are old enough to vote.

9. Got some bad advice from the Secretary of State.

8. Wanted to keep polling locations a secret.

7. Thought a lawsuit would spice things up.

6. Felt like playing a joke on their city.

5. Thought that no one would really care.

4. They totally deny that they did it.

3. Wanted to give voters a challenge.

2. Simply a power trip gone bad.

1. Because they felt like it.

0. It was time for a change.

-1. Just for the fun of it.

-2. Hey, it’s no big deal!

Walmart Blamed For Mitt Romney Loss Election 2012

Romney Loses By Landslide. Walmart To Blame.

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Washington, DC – The presidential election is finally over.  Obama wins by a landslide and will continue on being President of the United States for another 4 years.  However, new reports are coming in as to why Romney lost by such a landslide and Walmart is being blamed.

It is being reported that thousands upon thousands of stupid uneducated voters flocked to area Walmarts thinking that each and every one was an election polling station.  Some residents even drove hours upon hours to the closest Walmart only to find out that it was indeed NOT a polling station.  Walmart might offer everything, but not voting booths.

Once inside, voters went irate after learning that there were indeed no polling stations.  Trampling occurred like that you see on Black Fridays and multiple people have been hurt.  Two people reportedly shot.  However, this quickly passed as they realized they were in Walmart and could get 50 photo sticker prints printed of their ugly and repulsive baby for ONLY $3!!  What a deal!

Without all of these votes, no one will know if Mitt Romney could have won or how much more Obama would’ve beat Romney.

During the next election, Walmart plans on putting up 50ft tall bright neon signs stating that Walmart IS NOT A POLLING STATION in all Walmart locations.