Tag Archives: ballot measure

The Pot Now Legal In Four ND Counties

Leave a reply

4 ND counties pass Measure 3

With all the votes now in from the 2018 midterm elections, Measure 3 was successfully passed by a majority of voters in four North Dakota counties.

So now, it will be legal for North Dakotans over the age of 20 who live in Rolette, Benson, Sioux, and Cass counties to legally possess and grow the pot for recreational purposes.

The remainder of counties in North Dakota will be destined to live in the dark ages until such time as they see fit to join with the four heretofore previously mentioned counties, where it is now legal to recreationally possess and grow the pot.

Vote YES On Ballot Measure 11: Make FMO The Official Website Of North Dakota

Leave a reply
Where the urinal?

Where’s the urinal?

Bismarck, ND – If you care about the future of North Dakota, like we do, then make sure to vote YES on Measure #11!

This important ballot measure would make the FM Observer the official website of the state of North Dakota forever.

It would also take 1% of the oil extraction revenue and give it to the FM Observer to “do with as it wishes”.

Many have praised the FM Observer for its recent cutting-edge coverage of the Ebola Pandemic as well as the latest on the Downtown Fargo Vomit issue.

If you want good things to happen that will positively affect you and your family, vote YES on Measure 11.

If you don’t want your family to be living out of a box behind Walmart, vote YES on Measure 11.

If you want to show your appreciation to the FM Observer, as do most sane people living in North Dakota, vote YES on Measure 11.

Measure 11 is as important as Measure 5 and Measure 6 combined.

If you cannot find Measure 11 on your voting ballot, immediately cry foul and call for a complete investigation of that voting precinct, with a serious threat of a lawsuit.

Vote for Measure 11 to get whatever you want, for free, and delivered to your front door, no questions asked.

ND Measure 9 To Ban Happy Marriages

Leave a reply
caption here

Measure 9 is right after Measure 8

Fargo, ND – Due to an avalanche of misleading language, hidden agendas and incompetent proofreaders, North Dakota’s midterm elections will now include a ballot measure that would outlaw all happy marriages.

Measure 9 reads:

This constitutional measure would create and enact a new section to Article Q of the North Dakota Constitution stating, “The inalienable right of every human being to have a miserable marriage at any stage of that marriage must be recognized and protected. No happy, joyous, or blissful domestic union may be recognized as a marriage without an appropriate level of misery.”

“Voters need to understand that the wording of Measure 9 is condensed and simplified for voting day efficiency,” claims Measure 9 sponsor Joe Straitt. “We don’t want folks worrying about the legal consequences of the language, that’s our job. Just have faith that we know what’s best for North Dakotans and their personal relationships. Yes on 9!”

An inside source admits, “Measure 9 has been rewritten so many times, no one can really remember what the original purpose of it was. We just keep supporting it because…well, what else are we going to do with all these posters, flyers, mailers, buttons, signs, flags, banners, pens, mugs, t-shirts and key chains? We’re invested here. Maybe not in a better future, but invested all the same.”

Early polling suggests that Measure 9 is gaining support from voters who identify themselves as “Ball-And-Chain Independents”. Stay tuned to The FMO for up-to-the-minute results.