Tag Archives: freak show

“Days Of Our Lives” Soap Opera Being Replaced By Another Called “Endless Impeachment”

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Endless Impeachment will now be taking the place of Days of Our Lives

Washington, DC – Sadly, the long-running soap opera Days Of Our Lives which began in 1965 will soon be terminating due to lack of interest.

However, in its place will be another long-running soap opera called Endless Impeachment which does not suffer from a lack of interest.

Unlike Days Of Our Lives which was an hour-long show just on week days, Endless Impeachment will run 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

President Trump tweeted that he is looking forward to watching Endless Impeachment when he isn’t busy golfing, but thinks the show should instead be called Creatures From The Swamp!

Uncle Screwball Warning Trick-Or-Treaters To Avoid Scary Clowns Like Him

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Hi Kids! If you see a bad clown like me on Halloween, run in the opposite direction.

Moorhead, MN – As a public service in the name of survival safety, the infamous clown named Uncle Screwball (who is best known for freaking kids out) wants to warn parents and children to stay away from any scary-looking clowns around Halloween time.

Uncle Screwball not only wants to warn trick-or-treaters to avoid himself, but also some of his scary clown friends who also fall into the category of dark, bad, and twisted.

“It would be best to avoid: Doctor Loopy, Ga-Gonzo, Mr. Wacko, Nutso Job, Loony Brain, Big Bonkers, and Krazy Kook,” according the the admonishing Uncle Screwball.

The god-father of all psycho-clowns goes on to tell kids: “Bad clowns can be anywhere, so always stay watchful. They may be sitting motionless on a porch holding a bucket of candy, or hiding behind a large bush, or even quietly walking right behind you. Bad clowns have a lot of good tricks!”

Red River Valley Fair Freak Show

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Come see the Freak Show for some indelible memories

Come see the Freak Show for some indelible memories

Fargo, ND – When the Red River Valley Fair comes to town later this month, it is bringing more than just the Tilt-A-Whirl and Merry-Go-Round.

After many years of being locked in the closet due to political incorrectness, the Freak Show will triumphantly make its return.

If you’ve been having a hankering to see normal-challenged plants, animals, and homo sapiens, you’ll definitely want to pay admission to see the Freak Show, now back in its full glory.

All under one large Freak Show tent, you will be able to see a six-foot Venus Fly Trap that eats hamburgers, a two-headed sheep, the famous Bearded Lady, and the Human Pin Cushion.

You’re guaranteed to see at least thirty serious freaks at any one time. Every day at 4 o’clock there will be a Freak Parade where all the freaks (that can walk) will parade around the Midway to hopefully bring back a long line of business into the Freak Show tent.

Some of the other freaks you may see include:

  • Donkey Man
  • the Human Bowling Ball
  • the Three Sisters (that share the same body)
  • the Woman with Crocodile Skin
  • an animal that’s half dog and half monkey
  • Two-headed, one-nosed, three-eyed, double-mouth calf
  • the only living Cyclops
  • an Albino Family
  • Mr. Hotdog Fingers
  • plus a plethora of dwarfs and midgets along with 8-foot Mr. Goliath

At the bottom of every hour, the host for the Stage Show is a Three-Legged Man whose identical brother has real fish gills and sits in his water tank bedroom.

Pictures and videos are allowed in the Freak Show tent so bring your camera and smart phones. Just like some of the rides at the fair, the Freak Show will take your breath away but is safe and fun for the whole family.