Tag Archives: deny

Kindergartener Hitchhikes Home After School Bus Drops Him Off 75 Miles From Home

School bus driver drops young Fargo kindergarten boy off in Valley City.

Valley City, ND – A Fargo child who was attending his first week of kindergarten somehow mistakenly got dropped off in Valley City by the school bus that was to bring him home.

The child eventually did get back home by hitchhiking the 75 miles because he had “seen how to hitchhike on TV.”

The boy’s parents, who were already totally freaking out when their young boy was not on the after-school bus, freaked out even more upon discovering what had actually happened.

The bus driver claims he did not know the boy was still on the bus.

The company that owns the bus (whose slogan is “We put the bus in business!”) says it sadly regrets and strongly denies that it ever happened.

The boy, who is doing fine, says Valley City looked like a very nice place to possibly move to when he gets older.

Moral of the story: If your bus driver is dumb, you can get home with your thumb.

All Climate Change Deniers To Be ‘Rounded Up’ And Sent To Work Camps

Welcome to Carbon Footprint Global Warming Work Camp

Welcome to Global Warming Work Camp!

Marfa, TX – Ever since the threat of carbon emissions was deemed to be the #1 threat to our country’s safety, Big Government is wasting no time in dealing with deniers of Climate Change.

All who have publicly (or privately) denied Global Warming, or Climate Change in general, will be forcibly gathered by the U.S. Marshals Service and transported (free-of-charge) to one of many Federal detention facilities which have been thoughtfully set up in extremely remote parts of the country, such as Marfa, Texas.

At these “Denier Workcamps”, guests will be invited to self-tutorialize themselves on Climate Change facts and figures, perform various experiments on fracking and carbon dioxide pollution, make posters for upcoming Climate Change protests, and maby even help Algore collect unpaid carbon footprint taxes.

If you have ever overtly expressed doubt about Global Warming or Climate Change, expect a firm knock on your door by fully-armed U.S. Marshals sooner rather than later.