Tag Archives: movies

Golfer Ian Poultergeist Somehow Got Trapped In A Television Set

Ian Poultergeist trapped in this TV.

Buckinghamshire, England – Professional golfer Ian Poultergeist who is known for his bold fashion has somehow gotten trapped in an old television set.

Mr. Poultergeist: “Yes, I am definitely trapped in this TV and cannot seem to figure a way out.”

Becoming trapped in a television set is quite uncommon but has been known to happen from time to time, especially in England.

Cable Company: “We don’t know where Mr. Poultergeist is but would like to ask if you’d like to upgrade to our Premium Package.”

Ian Poultergeist’s golf caddie says Ian will continue to play in all upcoming tournaments that Ian has had scheduled for the 2017 season.

Mr. Poultergeist: “To all my fans: Hello and I’m fine. To everyone: Please help me find a way out of this Telly!”

Jack Nicholson Opening A Bar In Downtown Fargo

Jack Nicholson is The Shining example of what an actor should be like.

Fargo, ND – Actor Jack of the Nicholson clan plans to open a new bar in renascent downtown Fargo called The Cuckoo’s Nest.

Not only does Jack Nicholson plan on opening a state-of-the-art bar in Fargo, but he also plans on spending a lot of time there visiting with Fargo locals who also enjoy sipping adult beverages because Jack has also just announced his intentions to permanently move to Fargo, the place of his childhood birth.

“Since I was born in Fargo at a very young age, this is from where I would like to enter heaven at a very old age,” says the actor who’s won an Oscar for three different films including One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest.

All females servers in The Cuckoo’s Nest will dress like Nurse Ratched and a large sign on the wall will remind patrons: “If you don’t want to take your medication orally, I’m sure we can arrange for you to have it some other way.”

FM Observer: “So just one final question for you Mr. Nicholson: What’s the main reason you want to finally retire from acting and move to Fargo and start taking it easy…just hanging out at The Cuckoo’s Nest?”

Jack Nicholson: “You want answers? You want answers? I’ll answer the question! Because all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.”