Researchers Confirm That Thursday Is The New Friday

October 27th, 2016 | by Johnnny
Yes, indeed, Thursdays are the new Friday!

Yes, indeed, Thursday is the new Friday!

Duluth, MN – University of Minnesota at Duluth researchers have conclusively confirmed that Thursdays are now the new Fridays.

Just as we at the FM Observer have longly strongly suspected, that all-important Friday slot has now been taken over by Thurdays.

Professor Stuard Shy exclaims: “Because of the new extra tilting of the Earth, along with the advent of Thursday Night Football, yes indeed, Thursday has become the new Friday.”

By our calculations, because of this revelation, Tuesday afternoons are the new Humpday.

Professor Shy: “And expect to see more and more church goers going to church on Saturdays.”

How do you feel about all this? Please let us know by calling 1-800-THURSDAY and ask to speak directly with Professor Stuard Shy, whose name ironically can be rearranged to spell THURSDAYS!


The following two tabs change content below.
Contributing writer since January, 2013. I've been described by myself as a piano-playing omnivore who hates typos but loves chocolate milk in his coffee. As a Life Coach, some lessons I like to pass onto others are: 1. don't stare at strangers, especially in jail, 2. don't leave fun to find fun, 3. never pet a burning dog, 4. don't eat more than you can lift, and 5. when in doubt, jot it down. Click on any picture in my posts to see them in their full glory. All have been tweaked with either PicMonkey.com or Pixlr.com/Express or Lunapic.com :o)