Lime Disease linked to jumbo on-the-rocks margaritas!

Rochester, MN – At the Hellmann’s Mayo Clinic, researchers have positively linked Lime Disease to the excessive drinkage of lime-flavored margaritas.

Scientific data shows that people who consume multiple jumbo lime margaritas (usually during those discount-priced happy hours) are sixty times more likely to get Lime Disease than their non-margarita-drinking counterparts who religiously attend church choir practice.

Q: Can you still get Lime Disease if you don’t drink the jumbo lime margaritas?

A: Yes, of course you can. However, the chances of that happening are about as good as John Kasich getting to 1,237 delegates before the GOP convention.

Q: Is there anything that jumbo lime margarita drinkers can do to lessen their chances of contracting the dreaded Lime Disease?

A: No, not really, except perhaps to maybe join a church and volunteer to religiously sing in the church choir. Another tip would be to avoid attending any outdoor concerts where disease-carrying ticks might be waiting to bite into you just like someone who is hungry enough to eat a horse would bite into McDonald’s new McPony Sandwich.