Area Maiden Sues Tailor After Corset Does Not Collapse Ribcage

August 26th, 2014 | by Nick

From the archives: 23rd of May, 1894

corset5_bigFargo, ND — Area maiden Kreelen Maughth is suing the Main Avenue Tailor over what she claims is poor workmanship. Maughth says a 12¢ corset purchased over four score moons ago has had no ill effects on her ribcage and that her breathing is still far from irregular.

The lawsuit alleges that the tailor measured incorrectly and cut the wrought iron and horse hair a snug-but-not-too-snug length anyway. “My cage of ribs is of a fair comfort and my torso unconstricted. This should not be! I’ll have him lynched for his ignorance,” she declared.

Main Avenue Tailor Polten Von Cerklanak had this to say: “Perhaps m’lady purchased a size too big for thy bosom? ‘Tis not for me to decide. Present to me a bill of sale and I shall reimburse.”

Maughth has filed a formal paper with the Main Avenue Office of Law. If proven guilty, Von Cerklanak is set to be hanged at high noon this Sunday, 27th of May, 1894.


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