New Species Discovered At Red River Valley Fair

July 10th, 2014 | by Bill Burns
red river valley fair new species

Locusslayer Solarus

West Fargo,  ND – Scientists gather to search for new species.

Yesterday evening, Dr. William Francis and his team set out on an expedition to look for a new species of human.  A mission that took two years to put together.

“We have been surveying the Red River Valley Fair for over 20 years now.  It was time to put together an expedition.”

It didn’t take Mr. Francis and his team more than one hour to discover and document a new species.

“The new species we found is called ‘Locusslayer Solarus‘.”

They describe this animal as a nocturnal creature who survives on Bud Light, Doritos, and  World of Warcraft.

“It’s habitat is that similar to a nomad.  He moves from fair to fair when not slaying beasts in World of Warecraft.”

Mr. Francis and his team caution that the Locusslayer Solarus is a wild animal and very unpredictable.  They advise on keeping your distance and to watch them from afar.

Please click the picture to get a close up. The new species is wearing the black shirt with writing on the back.

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Bill grew up in one of the largest cities in the United States, Maza, North Dakota. Being a cow milker by trade, it was only after stroking thousands upon thousands of cow nipples was he able to save up enough money and move to Fargo, ND. It was here that he joined FM Observer. In his free time he enjoys carving rocking horses out of wood, healing the sick, and running marathons across oceans.