Oprah Wants Everyone To Join Weight Watchers Since She Owns 10% Of The Company

January 3rd, 2016 | by Johnnny
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Everyone who reaches their goal weight will receive a free yo-yo from The Oprah!

Chicago, Illinois – The Oprah is asking for everyone to join Weight Watchers to lose weight along with her.

After having her personal chefs help her balloon up to an astounding 850 pounds, now she is cleverly asking America to join her in dropping some tonnage.

While she loses weight, she and Jabba The Hutt will each be pocketing tons of money since they each own ten percent of Weight Watchers.

Some stupid questions we’d like answered are: How could The Oprah be so overweight if she’s already this involved with the company? What’s her goal weight? 400 pounds? What weight will she balloon up to after this profitable stunt is over? Is Jabba The Hutt also going to try to shed some tonnage?


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Contributing writer since January, 2013. I've been described by myself as a piano-playing omnivore who hates typos but loves chocolate milk in his coffee. As a Life Coach, some lessons I like to pass onto others are: 1. don't stare at strangers, especially in jail, 2. don't leave fun to find fun, 3. never pet a burning dog, 4. don't eat more than you can lift, and 5. when in doubt, jot it down. Click on any picture in my posts to see them in their full glory. All have been tweaked with either PicMonkey.com or Pixlr.com/Express.