Two Dead After Facebook Comment Section Argument Escalates

Fargo, ND—A local news outlet’s facebook comment thread got a little out of hand late yesterday. What started out as a simple weather forecast status update found itself turned into a battleground for what onlookers thought would develop into World Wide Web War III.

The news station and status creepers alike bore witness to a rapidly snowballing political argument that soon escalated into personal attacks. Other users looked on, horrified as commenter “Michael” somehow got into it with another user about Obamacare and the 1% vs the 99%:

This political argument soon intensified into hateful name-calling, and ultimately, a rage-fueled meet-up between the two.

The men hastily agreed to fight about it in a back alley but unfortunately, both brought guns. Upon seeing each other’s facebook avatars manifest themselves in real life, they simultaneously shot and killed one another.

When asked why he flew off the handle, now deceased user Michael had this to say:

“I blew his head off because I chose to be enraged. I made the decision to take offense to an unsolicited comment on an internet link that I also made a decision to click on. I have only myself to blame….I did this….in essence, I blew my own head off, and I’d do it again because that is who I am. I’m a Facebook Comment Rage-A-Holic.”