Area Man Finds Bitcoin In McDonald’s Happy Meal

If you found one of these in a McDonald’s happy meal, jump up and yell “cowabunga” then try to cash it in on the Darkweb Blockchain. Or, you could wait til bitcoin is worth a few thousand more, then figure it out. Up to you.

Moorhead, MN – Moorhead man Greithan Cutstash considers himself a lucky duck. Now he’s quacking about it.

Lucky enough was Greithan to find what appears to be a genuine bitcoin nestled inside a McDonald’s happy meal he bought for his son, Mance. “Bah gawd, that looks like one a them bit-things I seen about in the news,” he said when he noticed young Mance attempting to feed a large, fancy-looking coin to his dog. Turns out it was, in fact, one of many actual physical bitcoins minted around 2010.

As legend would have it: Some years ago, back when bitcoin was just getting going, McDonald’s tried giving them away in happy meals as a publicity stunt. At that time they were only worth a few cents. When the promotion started, kids were unimpressed to find a useless hunk of metal in with their chicken McNuggets. Parents were equally displeased. Needless to say, the promotion was short-lived and not all those bitcoins were sent out.

Wrick Zapruda. Bitcoin Knower-Abouter.

The zany story continues: A box of two dozen bitcoins was dispatched in happy meals by a Moorhead McDonald’s very recently. How? How could a small town McD’s be sitting on a veritable digital-to-physical crypto gold mine of sorts? Store manager Bilhelm Noisewater, who chose to remain nameless, claims they found themselves digging through storage for trinkets after running out of happy meal Pokemon a few days ago. What did they find? A box of “fake gold coins” encased in plastic. Perfect! Get those shiny nick-nacks into the happy meals before the shipment of Pokemon arrives tomorrow, he said. And out the drive thru window went roughly (at the time of this writing) $200,000.

So check those happy meal toys! If you notice little Timmy playing with a coin that looks like monopoly money, you could be (at the time of this writing) $8,235.01 richer.

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Interstrapolating condectistic devariance via opentasmic protensive mindopathy.