FM Observer Recruits Pizzaologist To Analyze Alleged New Pizza Corner Flavor

June 30th, 2016 | by Nick
Not the new logo.

Not a/the new logo.

Fargo, ND – As you are surely aware, Valley City’s own Pizza Corner pizza has been bought out by a Minnesota company named Bernatello’s. Much hubbub has been tossed about over the “new flavor” reveal. People are talking.

An example: “It smells like corporate influence. Like a suit and tie got caught in the packaging. It tastes shallow and pedantic, like a wealthy conglomerate,” states longtime Pizza Corner customer 2ddie Pophentopp via a Facebook post.

What we’ve gleaned from all this commotion is that there is a high probability of difference between pre-buyout and post-buyout Pizza Corner, although who can be sure?

Caxton Nudewrath, Pizzaologist®

Caxton Nudewrath, Pizzaologist®

That is why the FM Observer has recruited noted Pizzaologist Caxton Nudewrath to settle the debate over whether or not the new entity is doing anything different to the famous ‘za.

Nudewrath’s credentials leave no question as to his qualification. “I come to you with a major in Oven Physics and a minor in Grease Tactics; and a Masters in AmerItalian Cuisine with a PhD in Pizzaology.”

His colleagues agree. Ertson McFluck, noted Pizzaologist with sub-studies in flatbread and pot pie, has traveled the world analyzing pizza with Nudewrath. “Caxton has tried every type of ‘za in every major city in America and even abroad during his 6-month stint in Sicily. He will dissect every delectable dissimilarity–however numerous–between pre-buyout and post-buyout Pizza Corner. You can trust him as far as you can throw him.”

The summation of Nudewrath’s final analysis of Pizza Corner’s esteemed taco flavor variety:

“Initial comparison between pre-buyout and post-buyout Taco Pizza leaves me little to discuss. If you put a gun to my head and asked me to….well, actually, why would you threaten my life over pizza? Are you completely insane?? You’re the kind of person who should fail a background check. Anyway, the difference here is negligible and mostly indiscernible. They are compositionally, olfactarily and flavorously the same. Now if you’ll excuse me, i’m desperately needed at Pizza Palace headquarters in Veltchasm, Kentucky.”

 


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Nick

Co-Founder at FM Observer
Interstrapolating condectistic devariance via opentasmic protensive mindopathy.