Man Responsible For Olympic Ring Mishap Found Dead In Sochi

February 9th, 2014 | by Bill Burns

olympic rings Sochi, Russia – The man responsible for operating the Olympic rings during this years Winter Olympic Opening Ceremonies in Russia was found dead in his run down hotel room yesterday.

The Daily Currant has reported that T. Borris Avdeyev was found in his hotel room early this morning with multiple stab wounds.

So far it is being investigated as an ‘accident’.  However, people around the world are starting to question if it really was just an accident or if it was Vladimir Putin himself snuffing out the problem..

The local news paper was able to get a hold of Putin himself after he was finished with his daily afternoon greco roman wrestling matches with his buddies.

After taking his halo from his head and putting it down beside him, Vladimir simply stated, “Vodka.  Do you want?”

That was it.  He took a swag of some Vodka and then went back to his greco roman wrestling matches with his friends.

Although highly suspectful, we believe Mr Avdeyev did indeed slip and fall on some knives.

If there are any new details to this story we will sure report them.

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Bill grew up in one of the largest cities in the United States, Maza, North Dakota. Being a cow milker by trade, it was only after stroking thousands upon thousands of cow nipples was he able to save up enough money and move to Fargo, ND. It was here that he joined FM Observer. In his free time he enjoys carving rocking horses out of wood, healing the sick, and running marathons across oceans.