Tag Archives: medical practice

FMO’s Medivan To Provide Free Medical Check-Ups To Shovelers

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FMO’s new Medivan is now offering free full physical exams to anyone out shoveling.

West Fargo, ND – While out shoveling heavy snow and pushing your body to the limit, how would you like to step into the warmth of a mobile medical van for a free full physical examination?

Our long-time friend Dr. Fred Wangstone first had the idea of having a Medivan to provide free medical services while he was in prison for having impersonated a medical doctor.

Now that Dr. Wangstone is out of prison, your FM Observer has helped our friend Fred make his pipe dream come true!

If you are out shoveling your driveway, sidewalk, deck, or roof and you see Dr. Wangstone’s free Medivan coming down your unplowed street, simply wave it down to stop for your full free medical check-up along with unlimited Oreo cookies and some spicy hot rum punch.

Doctors Believe If You Can Live Long Enough You Might Be Able To Live Forever

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Live long enough to live forever.

Stanford, CA – Would you like to live forever? What if you had the option of not aging?

Medical researchers now think that if you can live another 30–50 years, you might be able to live as long as you want without ever growing old.

Recent exciting advances in the two areas of Telomere Extension and Genomic Editing are coming together to suggest that the aging process may be able to be controlled enough to never die.

However, once we reach that point, you will still have to worry about getting shot by a person who should not have a gun, and also the more likely scenario of getting hit by a distracted driver.

Fargo Hospital Hires First Monkey Doctor

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Dr. Bonzo is very excited to begin his medical practice in Fargo, North Dakota.

Fargo, ND – An area hospital is proud to announce a new team member to its full-time staff.

Dr. Panky Bonzo, who recently finished up his residency at the prestigious Cleveland Clinic, will begin seeing patients this summer.

To make Doctor Bonzo more at home, his office is being wallpapered in a jungle motif with decorative accent strips of yellow bananas along with multiple vines and ropes hanging from the ceiling.

Panky is a general practice doctor who tends to specialize in problems with the hands and feet, such as plantar fasciitis.

He is a very good listener, loves funny stories and can tell a few of his own.

Dr. Bonzo (who is currently single) loves walks along the river, sharing banana splits, playing on the monkey bars and watching old movies.